Babs Bon Mots

The Tiger's Wife

2012-01-01T12:37:00.000-08:00

The Tiger's Wife by Téa Obreht

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Tea Obreht writes a very strange story. I started this book months ago and put it down as I couldn't get involved. However, in light of the fact I had nothing to read, and that it was lent to me, and I really need to return it, thought I'd give it another go. If you don't like stories within stories, you may not like this book. In some ways, it reminds me of "Life of Pi", which was also very strange (in my opinion).

This story reads like a dream to me. You know how you can have dreams and they can seem so real, but are yet surreal, and seem so fantastic, and don't always make a lot of sense? That's what this book feels like to me. As I moved forward in the story I became more intrigued about the title and the story within the story. I don't feel like I have a complete understanding of the end, but, like a strange dream that sticks with you, the story is sticking with me. I want to come to terms with it. For this reason, it seems like a good book club pick to me--perhaps if I can talk about it with another reader or group,it will become clearer.

This is a rather nebulous review, so I'll just close with the fact that once again I am reminded of my naivety and innocence as far as my place in this world. What fortunate people we are to live in a country in which we don't live in the chaos and uncertainty of a war torn nation or to come to grips with the facts that the boundaries of our homelands can change as a result of wars and/or treaties. Although our men and women serve, we, in America, have relative security and peace. We can choose not to get involved in the difficulties of getting medicine, food, water even, because we have been blessed to be born here.

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Human Extremes

2012-01-01T12:19:00.000-08:00

Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience, and Redemption by Laura Hillenbrand

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Human beings can fall on such extreme ends of the spectrum--cruel and ruthluss, grace-filled and forgiving. You get to experience both in "Unbroken".

I am always amazed, when I read true life stories, how ignorant I am of historical events. I am also amazed at how evil human beings can be.

"Unbroken" started kind of slow for me, but a few chapters in I became intrigued and involved with the story of Louis Zamporini and his experiences as a POW interred in a Japanese camp. I'm intrigued by several things. One, it is so difficult for me to comprehend how people derive pleasure from hurting and demoralizing other people. In so many ways, my brain just cannot grasp this. What sort of sickness drives a person to demand that person eat excretement, or beat a person for really no reason at all.

In fiction from the old days, people were sometimes referred to as souls. I like that. It implies to me, that you see not just a person's body, but their heart, their person. It says, you are a person, you are worthwhile, you are so much more than just a race, or a body. You're real, you have value. I don't know that we see each other like that anymore, and Rudy's experience, as well as the other POW experiences, attest to the fact that they are really, even less than invisible to their captors. In some way, their captors see them as deserving of mistreatment. Truly, I find this so hard to fathom.

And then the "souls", the people whom they are abusing, they have a quality that is also difficult to comprehend. They survive. They have hope. They remain human. Would I be able to hold on to these qualities in similar situations, or would I give in to hopelessness and despair? Would I give up?

Louis's story has a happy ending. He survives. He has angry and bitter years, but, through God's grace, he forgives, he is absolved of the demons of anger, and lives his life. Just that simple statement should be enough to astound us. He's a testament to God's power to change lives. His story humbles me in my small struggles to live a life of grace.

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Your Heart: The Well-Spring of Life.

2012-01-01T11:40:00.000-08:00

When Crickets Cry by Charles Martin

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Reading is such a great escape from life. While waiting for a book on hold from the library I reread this book by Charles Martin. I really need to try some of his other works as I really love this book.

When Crickets Cry could be categorized as Christian fiction, but, for the most part I think the story would appeal to all. A gifted heart surgeon has run away from his practice due to a tragedy in his life. He runs into an endearing little girl, Annie, who is in need of a new heart. Through a series of circumstances his personal tragedy and her story begin to overlap. It seems only he can heal her heart, and only she can heal his. I liked how the author blended the scientific knowledge of the heart, with the emotional aspect of the heart. I remember I had tears at the end of the story the first time I read it. It fit the bill for this Sunday afternoon.

One of my favorite things in this story is how the main character, Reese, throws in quotes throughout his conversations with Annie. One such quote by Augustine:

"You stir man to take pleasure in praising You because You have made us for Yourself, and our heart is restless until it rests in You."

I had to look up this quote: "What the hand dare sieze the fire, and what should and what art, could twist the sinews of the heart? And when thy hart began to beat, what dread hand, and what dread feet? When the starts threw down their spears and water'd heaven with their tears, did he smile his work to see? Did he who made the Lame make thee? (William Blake: The Tiger--a poem I know, but had forgotten)

An example of some of the author's prose that resonated with me:

"There's a gold mine in salvageable wood draped in kudzu, pine needles and acorns is someone is willing to peel back the vines and plane the wood. It's a slow process, and you're bound to uncover a few snakes, but maybe lie is like that--you never know when something that's been hidden is going to rise up and bite you, or glow with a golden hue."

Even though this was a re-read, it still captured my heart and imagination.

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An Engaging, but Different, Southern Novel

2011-10-21T13:27:00.000-07:00

On Agate Hill by Lee Smith

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I'm not entirely sure how to describe this book. I can tell you it kept me engaged all the way through. I think it may be one of the strangest books I've ever read.

We have the main character, Molly Petree who has lost everyone she loves - we follow her from her youth to adulthood. She is stubborn, angry, determined, solitary--she calls herself a ghost girl. For much of her young life she pretty much decides what she is going to do it, and then does it. Her running commentary on the other characters in the story gives us a picture of the circumstances that surround her. Molly ignores the adults who try to "gentle" her and pretty much runs wild. She likes it that way.

Then we have the mysterious Mr. Black, who seems ominous right the start and "rescues" her. Mr. Black sends her to school. The head mistress hates her and doesn't want her there, but Molly's benefactor (Mr. Black) donates enough money to keep the school going, so Molly stays. On the surface, Molly does get "tamed" but an unfortunate circumstance forces her to leave. She leaves with her friend Agnes to go teach school in the mountains where she is loved, and falls in love--something she swore she would never do.

The characters in the story are interesting. The setting (Asheville, NC) descriptions fit for the community the author describes. Southern novels just seem to have a different quality about them. Southern women and the communities they come from are always a little bit unbelievable, but the southern woman always survives. I like that about them.

This book has been on my book list for quite some time - I will be checking out more works by this author.

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Intrigued to Read More Hemingway . . .

2011-10-19T07:38:00.001-07:00

The Paris Wife by Paula McLain

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I really liked this novel about Hemingway's first wife Hadley Richardson. This is one of those books that has me intrigued to figure out what's true and not true. Although the book is primarily about Hadley, the bigness of how Hemingway, and his counterparts lived their lives comes through loud and clear. I'm also struck again by how often gifted writers and artists seem to be such tortured souls. Does their talent eat them up inside so that they can't be separate from it. It seems like the talent becomes almost obsessive, leaving no room for balance in personal lives. If the novel is correct, Hadley certainly became totally caught up in Hemingway's life, losing her sense of self in him. It's terribly sad in many ways.

I loved that the book referenced the Nick Adams stories, which was a book club read. It always adds an extra piece of enjoyment for me when a book mentions books that I have read. I am looking forward to picking up Hemingway's "A Moveable Feast" which is his take on the Paris years for reference.

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What Makes the Difference for a Kid?

2011-09-30T15:22:00.000-07:00

Breaking Night: A Memoir of Forgiveness, Survival, and My Journey from Homeless to Harvard by Liz Murray

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Thank you Goodreads for this complimentary copy of "Breaking Night".

This was one of those books that I didn't think I liked that much, but then found myself telling other people about it. It's always interesting when that happens, and I realize I liked it better than I thought.

I am amazed at the author's memory, and also stunned that children grow up in homes like hers. I can't imagine growing up in a home where "normal" is your parents lining up their drug paraphernalia on the kitchen table and shooting up. A home where you wait eagerly for that disability check, buy a few groceries, and then spend the rest on drugs. Waiting for the mailman by the window, while you eat, perhaps, bread with mayonnaise for supper. Yet this little girl loved her parents. She wanted to be with them and feel loved by them. It's an experience that I really can't comprehend.

Liz was observant and resourceful. She didn't go to school, but she survived. She watched and learned how to steal, how to make money pumping gas, and how to evade those pesky phone calls from school, threatening to remove her from home and put her in a group home.

By the time Liz was in her early teens, her mom had contracted aids. She left Liz's dad and moved in with another man. Through a variety of circumstances Liz decides to leave the protection, and the care, of her mom and begins to live on the streets. She followed this "carefree" life until she realized she couldn't count on other people to take care of her the rest of her life. She realized as well, that she was the only person she could count on to make that change.

My favorite parts of the book were towards the end, where Liz made a conscious choice to go back to school. She was still homeless, but she realized she needed to get an education to move forward. She shares how discouraging it was to visit alternative schools and be judged by how she looked, and dismissed without being acknowledged as someone who could achieve. She almost gave up - but somehow, for reasons she doesn't know, a feeling of hope brings her to the next alternative school interview. She arrives late, but ends up being accepted. Enrolling requires her to get her old transcripts, and she shares how she felt like such a failure when she saw all those failing grades - she only passed one class. But she hit on the idea of asking for a transcript from her new school, Humanities Preparatory School. She looks at that fresh page, and all those blanks just waiting for an "A". That's we she decides for herself. She wants all A's and she wants to complete four years of high school in two years. She also shares how hard it was--hiding her homelessness, finding places to sleep and shower, finding food, and making that decision, every day, that she is going to get up and go to school--not just stay in bed and hang out with her friends. She tells how her teachers really look at her, and really want to know her. She begins to love them, and to love school, and she wants to go to school not only to learn, but because she doesn't want to disappoint them.

This, the love between a teacher and student, seems to me to be the only way to hook kids into achievement. Respect for the student, and a student's respect for the teacher, is the winning combination. I love that Liz has taken her education and is using it to help ther students. In fact, they have opened one of the first schools for homeless students in New York City (www.manifestliving.com).

I highly recommend this read!

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Will You Cross the Line?

2011-09-12T17:20:00.000-07:00

The Line by Teri Hall

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I really loved this book and you should run right out and buy it. I can't stand that the library does not yet have the sequel "Away", and I may have to run out and buy both of them myself, even though I've made a semi-vow to cut back on my book purchases.

If you want to have a great discussion with your teen on prejudice, being judgmental, being brave and doing what's right, this is the book for you.

Once again I am stuck to generalities while reviewing a book - you just have to read it, and have your friends read it too so that you can talk about it together. I was telling my friend Lara about this book on the phone - she could not see me, but I was literally jumping up and down from the excitement of it! She had to tell me to stop sharing so that she could find out for herself what would happen. This is why I'm not telling you anything other than you need to read it!

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I'm a Fan of Gary D. Schmidt

2011-09-12T17:04:00.001-07:00

Okay for Now by Gary D. Schmidt

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I don't know why I never read any Gary Schmidt prior to this year. I had heard good things about "Lizzie Bright and the Buckminster Boy", and just never picked it up till now.

I am in the weird spot of wanting to tell you all about these books, but, at the same time not wanting to tell you anything about these books--I don't want to spoil the stories for you.

So, instead, I'll tell you some reasons I'm enjoying this author.

1) He weaves culture and history into the stories - you're learning as you go. Not everything has to be new and technologically exciting--there is beauty in history, and character.

2) He respects kids and their instincts as to what is right and wrong.

3) He shows us that adults can learn from kids.

5) Grace and forgiveness are not named, but, they definitely show up in these stories.

6) I want to know the background conversations between the moms and dads . . . I think this author totally shows in his stories how a moms quiet influence has an impact on the family. I used to say to friends that I'm the mirror of what happens in my house. If I'm crabby and mean, it spreads to the rest of the family. If I practice the fruits of the spirit - peace, love, joy, etc., that is mirrored in my family.

Definitely pick up these books and enjoy a quiet afternoon with them . . .

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Wanting . . . What?

2011-08-15T17:29:00.000-07:00

I have decided that I really don't like my 50's. I'm thinking of this stage of my life as the years of discontent. I can't seem to feel settled and at peace in my life at home or at work. I often feel bored, bored, bored, and how can my mundane life matter at all to anyone?

Is this a product of my age? Of the sense that now is the time to consider what is real, true, lovely and important? Of the sense that yes, I'm 53, and the time to grab hold of whatever it is I want to grab hold of better be happening sooner rather than later? I feel like a two year old . . . wanting . . . something . . . what. . .is. . .it?!

I feel like there really is a something. That God's preparing me for something, but I can't see what it is. Could it be that I'm living the something? That the people I see and encourage are what God has for me. I just don't know.

It frustrates me.

I recently read an author who said to God - "I want to know the how. How to go about this or that, how to live like I've been set free. How to be who God created me to be." God's answer was - "let go of the how, you need to drink my milk and eat my food--that's what's important. The answers will come later" (66 Love Letters). I like that, and think I have to let go of my "what is it You have for me to do", but . . . it's hard.

For a number of months now, I've had this quote on my desk: "What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?" I've been pondering it, but haven't come up with an answer. I'm trying to drink the milk and eat the food . . .but failing.

Then at Leadership Summit, the theme - Action Trumps Everything. (Lee Schlesinger) Does it? How do you know when to act, and if the time to act is now. . . Lee would say step up, take action. How do you know unless you try. . . but what if you don't know what it is you want to try? Still working at drinking the milk and eating the food . . .

Another theme of the summit - tough callings. I already wrote about Mama Maggie. She had a clear call. She is at peace. Jeremiah the prophet had a tough call. God called him to preach and he did, although he was beat up a lot for his obedience. God finally told him to tell the people, if they didn't obey they would be broken into pieces like the clay pot he was to throw on the ground. Jeremiah obeyed God, and got beat up for his trouble once again . . . not sure I want to get beat up, but. . . what passion he had for God.

Each of the Summit participants received a shard of a clay pot, and quiet time to consider what our piece of clay might be saying to us. On one side, I wrote, what am I afraid of. On the other side, break my heart with what is breaking Your (God's) heart, a challenge from Brenda Salter McNeil.

I feel jealous of these folks who know who they are and what they are called to do. Frustrated, as I feel lost. Guess for now I keep drinking the milk and eating the food. . .

Mama Maggie

2011-08-14T12:12:00.000-07:00

I attended the Willow Creek Leadership summit simulcast at Christ Memorial this past week. There are a number of contemplations rolling through my brain, but for right now, I'll concentrate on Mama Maggie.

I am struck first by the countenance of Mama Maggie. She is a woman who looks peaceful and content--she actually looks holy to me.

Mama Maggie gave up a cultured, elegant life to work with the children and people who live in literal garbage dumps in India. Children sleep in the garbage. They eat the garbage. . .

When she spoke about this choice, she spoke in a humble, unassuming way. Yet her first words, about the first thing to do, which is sell everything are powerful to me. I understand that not all of us are called to this extreme, yet part of me wonders, is that really true? This is after all what Christ asks of us when He says, follow me. . .

Some of my favorite bits from her talk:

If you want to be a hero, do what God wants you to do
Forgiveness is not between you and the other, it's between you and God . . He holds the account

and my favorite bit, about silence - she says "silence is the step to getting all the treasures . . . it is there we experience eternity". This is what she said:

Silence your body to listen to your words
Silence your tongue to listen to your thoughts
Silence your thoughts to list to your heart beating
Silence your heart to listen to your spirit
Silence your spirit to listen to HIS Spirit
You silence all to listen to the One.

This seems beautiful and desirable to me - but how to get there?

I think you must have to sell everything, including your husband and children if you have them. How else can you even get to silence?

As I was trying to have a little time of contemplation to write down these thoughts my husband (and I don't even have children at home anymore) kept bothering me - where are my shorts, what about that plant, etc. Right now I feel about as far from hearing God's Spirit as I can be, and I know there is no way I'm looking holy. . .

To support Mama Maggie's work, please visit the Stephen's Children site.

The Story Above All Stories

2011-08-08T17:34:00.001-07:00

King's Cross by Timothy Keller

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I cannot recommend "King's Cross" highly enough. There were so many parts that spoke to me, that brought me to new awareness of the gift of Jesus to the World.

How can it be that we have lost the urgency, the joy, the passion that is the real and true story of Jesus. Like C.S. Lewis, Timothy Keller opens my brain to new pathways of understanding of just how significant the death of Jesus on the cross is.

I know this seems weird to say. I'm a Christian - one would think I'm feeling this all the time. But, I'm not. Honestly, sometimes I think I am more worried about hurting a person's feelings, or offending a person by sharing the story of Jesus. Keller explains gospel means "news that brings great joy"--why in the world wouldn't I be eager to share that with someone?

How have we lost that? How have we let the world convince us that sharing Jesus' news of great joy is not a good thing?

I'd like to entice you with excerpts, but I practically have to quote the whole book! I'll give you some pictures of the essence.

In Chapter 1, we learn that the Trinity (the Father, the Son, the Holy Spirit) are

"each centering on the others, adoring and serving them . . . this makes God infinitely, profoundly happy . . . if it's true that this world has been created by the Triune God, then ultimate reality is a dance . . . if this world was made by a Triune God, relationships of love are what life is really about . . . He must have created us not to get joy, but to give it".

The author then goes on to the story of Jesus temptation in the wilderness. He explains the wilderness is a battleground, and Satan is wanting to tempt us away from the dance. Using the story of Adam, Keller explains that God said to Adam:

"because you love me, don't eat from the tree--just because I say so. . . Obey me about the tree and you will live".

We know that Adam didn't live up to his end of the bargain.

Now Satan goes to Jesus in the wilderness - Satan comes to Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane:

"the ultimate antigarden to the Garden of Eden. . .God said to Jesus, 'Obey me about the tree',--only this time the tree was a cross--and you will die. And Jesus did. He has gone before you into the heart of a very real battle to draw you into the ultimate reality of the dance. What He has enjoyed from all eternity, he has come to offer to you".

In the afterward of the book, Keller tells us that:

"Steven Spielberg was refused any Oscars until he stopped making movies with only happy endings, yet his fairy tale-ending movies are his most popular. . . critics observe this and scowl that, of course, "escapist" stories will always be popular".

He (Keller) goes on to say that Tolkien argues:

"people sense that such stories point to some underlying Reality. As we read or watch them, we are being told that the world is certainly filled with danger . . . nonetheless there is a meaning to things, there is a difference between good and evil, and above all there will be a final defeat of evil . . .the gospel story of Jesus is the underlying Reality to which all the stories point. . . it is the true story; it happened".

Keller also shares the words of theologian Robert W. Jensen:

"our culture is in crisis because the modern world has lost it's story. We once thought that life had a purpose, that there was something to live for, and that there was hope for a resolution to the sufferings of the world. Now, many say, none of these things are true".

What a sad statement.

If ever there was a time for sharing "news of great joy", it is now, don't you think? I'm a Christian. I have the antidote. Guess what, the antidote is a story. I love stories, and this one is true. I need to be as eager to share this story as I am to share the stories of the novels I read.

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Poppies = Imagination

2011-07-31T11:12:00.001-07:00

The Language of Flowers by Vanessa Diffenbaugh

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I ran across this book in my favorite place to prowl in the library - the advance review section. I checked it out on Goodreads when I got home and saw that it had an average of four stars plus, and it totally lived up to that. I was engaged in the story from beginning to end, and keep going back to re-read bits of it.

Victoria has been shuttled to numerous foster homes. She has put up a tough and defiant exterior to protect her heart from the rejection that she knows will eventually come her way. I think the author got this character exactly right. Don't you think it's true that when hearts are hurt people put up all kinds of barriers to protect themselves? Along the way though, Victoria meets two somebodies that love her, and as always, real love, can break down those crusty exteriors. It doesn't happen overnight though, it takes time. This bit is also true to life, don't you think? It's only consistent and constant love and grace that can break down those walls.

Victoria learned about the language of flowers on her journey to wholeness. I loved learning the meanings of flowers, and how they were used in communication in Victorian times, and how they could be used in the same way today. People are always looking for a little magic in their lives, and Victoria's meaningful bouquets provide just what they are looking for.

There are several bits in the story where flowers are used for conversations, and I thought that was charming, although sometimes the message of the flowers themselves were actually quite difficult.

I liked how the people Victoria met took the chance of encouraging and helping her. They also showed love where none was expected, and didn't give up on Victoria.

I can't tell you more without ruining the story--give yourself a treat and add this to your booklist.

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War and Life Choices

2011-07-29T15:54:00.001-07:00

Gifts of War by Mackenzie Ford

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Gifts of War begins with the World War I 1914 Christmas Truce (widespread unofficial ceasefires that took place along the Western Front around Christmas of 1914). I did not know this was a true fact until I googled it after finishing the book.
Wilhelm (German) and Hal (British) meet during the truce and have a conversation. In the course of the conversation, Hal makes a promise to Wilhelm, one he does not keep. This failed promise embarks him on a life of deceit. A life he willfully chooses. Here's the thing, Hal is not a bad man. He could be you, or me. The questions he asks as he makes his choices, could be questions you or I ask ourselves. Once you take that first small step of deceit, it is easy to take the next one, or two, or three. It is very rare that deceit does not catch up with us in some way, and this proves true for Hal.

There are so many other nuances in the book. Think how strange, and how amazing, for soldiers fighting to the death to stop, decorate their trenches, sing songs together and share gifts. They made plans to bury their dead during the cease fire. And then, in one or two days, to begin killing each other again.

What about spying for your country? This could entail literally sleeping with the enemy, killing acquaintances and the like. Basically, it is living a life of approved deceit. Deceit with honor. That's a misnomer if I ever heard one.

What about hating someone, just because they are German, or British,or Dutch, or Hispanic - and then, endeavoring, when war is over, to start over again in peace. Surely at that time, it is just a word, what about real peace? How does one attain it, that peace of Shalom (living harmoniously), after a war time experience.

These are some of the questions you'll ponder as you consider lives impacted by war, both in the past and the present.

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An Intense Read

2011-07-24T17:38:00.000-07:00

Room by Emma Donoghue

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I was not excited to read this book,it sounded creepy to me. And, I have to say, it is a little creepy, but, it also held my attention throughout. So why did I read it? Book club. Sometimes you are forced to read things that you don't really want to, and, it usually ends up all right. I can't say that I enjoyed the book, but I was totally immersed, and have gone back to read parts several times.

If you think you're going to read this book, you may not want to read past this sentence . . .

The title makes so much sense once you've read the story.

"Room" is Jake's world. It is all he knows. To him, room is real, and everything else is not real. Jake is not just smart, he's precocious. He's also incredibly naive. He lives in this small room, with a few stories, and a pattern to every day. Objects are named and become his friends. He loves his mom, he loves room, he loves his routines. He questions. His brain begins to be stretched. He learns there is a real world, this isn't all there is. This scares him. His mom asks him to perform a daring deed. He does, and their whole life changes.

For his mom, the change is mostly great, but for Jake, not so much. Everything he loves, everything that is familiar, is gone. He wants it back. This is hard for his mom, and for him--for so long they were just the two of them, and they mostly agreed on everything. Now the world is bigger, and has to expand to include other people.

I am glad for learning about the new life - I liked Steppa, and I felt Jake's awkwardness, and his mom's exhilaration with freedom, and frustration with Jake's slowness to embrace the freedom were expressed well. I thought the reaction of his mom's parents were real and believable.

The one thing I struggle with a bit is the fact that Jake is just five. I'm not sure a five year old would really have been able to perform such a daring deed.

On the copyright page, it says that the book is totally fictional, and I believe this to be true, except . . . today, I watched the Jaycee Dugard interview with Diane Sawyer. I have to wonder if the author's imagination was sparked by this true story of a young girl who was abducted, raped, imprisoned in a soundproof room, and gave birth to 2 children during her 18 year imprisonment. Having just finished "Room", and then watching the interview, there are some real similarities. Certainly both the interview and the book teach us that evil is real and in the world. After watching the Jaycee interview, I think we all need to be more diligent about caring for our neighbors, and being brave enough, and taking the risk to report, where we believe there may be wrong doing. I think sometimes we feel embarrassed, after all, what if we're wrong. Perhaps, we should be asking ourselves more often, what if we're right?

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A "Can't Put It Down" Book

2011-07-09T16:35:00.001-07:00

Harvesting the Heart by Jodi Picoult

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I like Jodi Picoult's books, but this one I just could not put down. I started it on Thursday night, and stayed up way past my bedtime, reluctantly putting it away as I had to get up and go to work on Friday.

Friday night did my chores as quick as I could, anticipating the time I could sit down and finish it!

Paige's mom ran away when she was 5 years old. Paige ran away when she was 18. She's been in love twice, and now she has a baby of her own. Exhausted from caring for her infant while her cardiologist husband puts in long hours at work, she finds that she's losing herself. How can she find herself again, reconcile her past, and reconcile her old self with her new self and her role as mother? How can her heart heal so that she is whole again?

I loved Paige and her questionings, her naivety, and her honesty. I loved that she was an artist, and her special gift that made her art unique. I loved how she loved her dad--actually, how they loved each other.

It's always curious to me how some books pull you in, and others not so much. This one definitely had my undivided attention!

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Hope for Prodigals

2011-06-05T12:28:00.001-07:00

Out of a Far Country: A Gay Son's Journey to God. A Broken Mother's Search for Hope. by Christopher Yuan

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Thank you to Waterbrook Multnomah for my free copy of "Out of a Far Country".

I wasn't sure what to expect from this book, but found it to be interesting, informative, sad, and hopeful.

The book is actually two stories in one. The mother's journey to Christ, healed marriage and unconditional love, and the son's journey from rebellion into a relationship with Christ, and healing and reconciliation with his own family.

I honestly don't know if I as a mother could have exhibited the grace that Christopher's mother exhibited towards him. His lifestyle of same sex relationships, drugs, and journey to self destruction would be enough to kill any hope one might have for reconciliation and wholeness. Chris was blind to the risks involved in his choices--it is actually surprising that he's still alive today. It is amazing to see how God uses our brokenness to bring us back to Him. Thank goodness He does.

One thing that was missing for me. Christopher has a brother Steven. Although Steven is mentioned early in the book,we don't get to hear what happened with Steven once his parents and brother became Christians.

I also liked Christopher's reasoning of Holy Sexuality. How many of us don't use sex, whether heterosexual or homosexual, as a replacement for living a holy life for God. Or, take away sex, just any covetousness, or idol, to fill our emptiness other than God.

To learn about Christopher Yuan's ministry, you can visit his website christopheryuan.com.

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My Favorite of Lisa See's Books!

2011-05-22T14:47:00.001-07:00

Dreams of Joy: A Novel by Lisa See

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Goodreads, you are spoiling me for anything other than reading! I had no intentions of whiling away the day by reading a book, but I received my recent win, "Dreams of Joy" on Thursday, started reading Saturday morning and couldn't stop. I have read Lisa See's other books ("Snowflower and the Secret Fan", "Peony in Love", "Shanghi Girls") so was very pleased to score this win. "Dreams of Joy" is a continuation of the "Shanghi Girls" story--in some ways I wish I had re-read "Shanghi Girls" before I started "Dreams of Joy", just so that I could refresh the characters in my head.

"Dreams" is the story of Joy, Pearl's daughter. (This is hard, I don't want to spoil the story by sharing too much.) Basically, Joy finds out some family secrets and leaves her home (America) and goes to China, where she buys into the communist philosophy. Along the way she loses her naivety, falls in love, meets her father, learns that she is a strong person, as well as to appreciate her family. Basically she grows up.

Meanwhile her mom (Pearl) follows her to China and learns some things about her ownself, her relationship with her sister, as well as her daughter.

Really liked this book. As in See's other books, you will learn about Chinese culture and history. In this book, there are several characters with bound feet. With the onset of communism, women were discouraged from this practice. In fact, those who had bound feet were encouraged to unbind them, which turns out to be a painstaking process with less than ideal results. Although the feet will unfurl, they cannot be "normal" since the bones were broken in the binding process when they were young. In the afterward the author mentions the photos of Joseph Rupp and his bound feet project. It was interesting to read the stories of these women, who just accepted this rite of passage as necessary to getting a husband, as well as to see their photos. You can visit the website here: http://www.josephrupp.com/bfindex2.html

Highly recommend this book!

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2011-05-19T16:40:00.001-07:00

The Daughter's Walk: A Novel by Jane Kirkpatrick

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I was excited to receive this book for free from Waterbrook Multnomah. I like this author and have enjoyed a number of her books.

The Daughter's Walk is based on the true story of Helga Estby and her 18 year old daughter Clara, who, in 1896 accepted a wager from the fashion industry to walk from Spokane Washington to New York City within seven months. If successful, they would win $10,000 and save the family farm.

I always like books about spunky women, and these two certainly were. Their lives, and the lives of their family, were forever changed by their decision. They had adventure, but their decision to walk brought them some personal tragedy, and, sadly, they missed the deadline by two weeks. Once they returned to the farm, Clara made the decision to leave her home, and did not return for over 20 years.

Kirkpatrick weaves truth and fiction in the tale as she conjectures what Clara might have done, and what choices she made. This is where it got frustrating for me - not in the story itself, I thought it was good, but I wish I knew what was truth and what was fiction. I want to know the true story of Clara and her choices! I tried to look up some information online, but there wasn't much there - it is a mystery as to the real reason why Clara left and even to some extents what she did.

To view the book trailer, and see some pics of Clara and her mom, go here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UoxjLeTTw...

If you haven't read any of Kirkpatrick's books yet, you should give her a try! Two of my favorites are A Gathering of Finches and A Sweetness to the Soul.

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2011-04-30T06:16:00.001-07:00

The Sisters of Sinai: How Two Lady Adventurers Discovered the Hidden Gospels by Janet Martin Soskice

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

One of the things I liked best about this book is how the sisters did not allow themselves to be constrained by the societal limits imposed on women in the 1800's. Although women were not often educated in that time, their father did not ascribe to that theory, and taught them languages at an early age. Their father died when they were in their 20s, and, against popular opinion they traveled to Egypt on their own. This was just the beginning of their many travels. Along the way they learned about ancient manuscripts stored at St. Catherine's monastery and set on their way to find them. Agnes taught herself Syriac, the language she would need to translate the manuscript they were after and they set out on a secret expedition to find it. As a result they made one of the most important biblical finds of their day - Codex Sinaiticus Syriacus (four gospels written in Syriacus, a form of the language Jesus would have spoken). The following, describes it well:

It took them nine days to travel across the Sinai desert, with one day for rest on the Sabbath. They had seven camels carrying tents along with provisions for 40 days, including cages of chickens, turkeys and doves. When they arrived at the monastery they quickly gained the confidence of the monks, thanks as much to their fluent Greek as their letters of introduction from Cambridge friends. They soon uncovered a stash of Syriac manuscripts and were quick to identify the palimpsest. They had been persuaded to bring along a camera and assiduously photographed every page, easing apart the stuck pages with the steam from their kettle. But when they got back to Cambridge they discovered that their photos were not good enough to elucidate the hidden text. They returned a few months later with academics from Cambridge and spent a month painstakingly tracing every letter. Rivalry soon soured relationships with the other academics, but it was Agnes who eventually published the definitive edition of what became known as the Codex Sinaiticus Syriacus, and it was she who eventually furnished an English translation

These ladies were in their 50s when they made this discovery. I love that they did not let their gender, their age, prejudice against their self-taught learning, public opinion keep them "at home", where no doubt many thought they belonged. Indeed, they traveled and collected and translated manuscripts for the rest of their adult lives.

In addition to learning their story, you'll learn a lot about biblical thought of the day, and the history of the written Bible. All in all an interesting and enjoyable read.

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An Honestly Good Read

2011-04-27T15:00:00.001-07:00

To Be Perfectly Honest: One Man's Year of Almost Living Truthfully Could Change Your Life. No Lie. by Phil Callaway

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I liked this book. I felt that the author infused humor into the stories, but then in the last pages of each chapter he examined the focus of the chapter with seriousness and thoughtfulness. It's obvious he loves the Lord, and equally obvious that he struggles. Isn't that just so true of all of us? I felt the author was very real and sometimes vulnerable in his emotions and life. That kind of transparency makes me want to work harder at the challenges in my own life.

I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah

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Escape into Another World!

2011-04-23T09:19:00.001-07:00

The Distant Hours by Kate Morton

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I started reading Distant Hours last night (Friday) and just finished it (Saturday at noon). Like Thirteenth Tale I was loathe to put it down until I was finished. Other than making breakfast I have done nothing but read, and am, in fact, still in my jammies!

I was hooked by the second paragraph:

"It is moonless when the Mud Man comes. The night has slipped on a pair of fine leather gloves, shaken a black sheet across the land: a ruse, a disguise, a sleeping spell, so that all beneath it slumbers sweet."

I loved the descriptive language the author use, like "wrestle my attention forwards", or speaking of the library books "My fingers positively itched to drift at length along their spines, to arrive at one whose lure I could not pass,to pluck it down, to inch it open, then to close my eyes and and inhale the soul-sparking scent of old and literate dust." (I can so relate!)

It's been a while since I've had book take me so far out of the present and totally immersed in the world created in the book. This is the power of a good story and I wish there were more of them out there.

Chapters switch between time frame and character voices. If this is challenging for you, it may not be the book for you. However, I loved how each character had a place in the story and how it was all tied together at the end. To learn more, you'll have to read it yourself.

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Love Wins

2011-04-17T17:54:00.000-07:00

Love Wins: A Book About Heaven, Hell, and the Fate of Every Person Who Ever Lived by Rob Bell

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I must be honest. I have been more fascinated by the controversy surrounding "Love Wins" than the book itself. It is arousing such passion in so many people, and the debate is not always kind.

You'll have noticed I only gave a 3 star rating--nothing to do with the controversy, merely the fact that the book didn't resonate with me.

There is a part of me that thinks a better title would be: Love Won. If Jesus had not died for you and me on the cross, then what's the point? We cannot possibly love anyone with a Christlike (self-surrendering, self-sacrificial) love without the cross paving the way, family pictures notwithstanding. . .

Love Wins also talks about people being accepted by Christ (ie: into Heaven) even if they don't know His name. I have to confess, there's a part of me that finds this attractive. But then again, God knows our names, He even has a secret name for each of us (Revelation 2:17), and He has our names written on His hands (Isaiah 49:16). The Amplified Version of Isaiah says

"Behold, I have indelibly printed (tattooed a picture of) you on the palm of each of my hands".

God tells us our ways are not His ways, and our thoughts not His thoughts, so thankfully we can let Him take care of that bit. When He knows me so intimately though, I should be falling all over myself to make sure other people do know His name!

I have heard the teaching on 'Heaven on Earth' in a Ray VanderLaan series, so this was not new to me. I feel like I have an unfair advantage over readers who didn't have this teaching. You can't capture the richness of Heaven on earth (chaos to shalom) in a chapter (consider that Ray taught it over the course of six or seven sections). Ray taught us that where-ever God's will is done, there is Shalom. Shalom means everything is as God intended it to be. Then he (Ray) asks us, "are you willing to address the evil in your heart and life? Will you allow God to use you to bring Shalom?" I feel like those questions, that passion, didn't come through in Love Wins. The same would be true for chapter six, 'There are Rocks Everywhere'. I've heard the Exodus 17 story taught by two separate biblical scholars, and the richness of the water coming out of the rock was not captured (in one of the teachings it was portrayed as the first Easter, and I wish I had the words to describe it all, but I don't).

The books about God I love are the ones that make me aware of His power and how that can change me into being that shalom-bearer. In no particular order, my favorites are:

Fresh Wind Fresh Fire

The Christian's Secret To a Happy Life
Hinds Feet in High Places
Radical and Radical Together
The Hole in the Gospel

As mention previously, I have been fascinated by the controversy and spent some time reading multiple reviewers. My favorite, both for it's graciousness and it's thoroughness is Dr. Ben Witherington's blog. The link will bring you to chapter 8, which sums up his thoughts on the book and on Rob Bell (he believes he writes from a poet's perspective), but you can read his posts on each chapter if you want to take the time.

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Do I Unleash God's Power?

2011-04-06T17:23:00.001-07:00

Radical Together: Unleashing the People of God for the Purpose of God by David Platt

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

If you enjoyed "Radical: Taking Back Your Faith From the American Dream" as I did, then this book is for you. Once again, Platt does not allow you to become complacent in your walk with God. He challenges us to really follow the faith practices that Jesus modeled for us while here on earth.

He reminds us

"Don't sit in a classroom; share your lives. Don't build extravagant places; build extraordinary people. Make disciples who will make disciples who will make disciples, and together multiply this gospel to all peoples."

Platt has a passion for igniting people to really take the Bible and God's message seriously. He uses God's word to convict us of the message of God (go and make disciples) and bring it to all people. He brought to my attention a verse that I had not considered before. Matthew 24:14

"This gospel of the kingdom will be preached in the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come." (emphasis mine)

Platt explains that the original word for "nations" in the New Testament is "ethne" and refers to all the ethnic peoples of the world. What Jesus is telling us in the Bible is that

"the end of the age will come when people from every single ethnic group have come to Christ."

Platt tells us there are eleven thousand people groups in the workd and more than six thousand of them are still "unreached". This is an awesome responsibility that God has given us, and one that I personally need to grow in.

In the beginning of the book, Platt shares a story of a man who had spent most of his adult life involved in programs and serving on committees in his church. When he began to become active in discipling and leading others to God he realized that

"I have spent my life doing all the stuff in the church that I thought I was supposed to do. But I'm realizing that I have missed the most important thing: making disciples".

Isn't that just true for most of us? We do all the "right things" from a world point of view, but are we really following God's commandment to "make disciples".

This book will make you wonder - am I fully surrendered to God. It will make you ask - God, what do you want me to do.

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The Ale Boy's Feast

2011-04-02T15:15:00.001-07:00

The Ale Boy's Feast: A Novel by Jeffrey Overstreet

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I enjoyed "The Ale Boy's Feast", although I was at a bit of a disadvantage--I had not realized that this was the final book in a trilogy called The Auralia Thread. If I had read the first two books, I think this read would have been much more meaningful for me.

If you have a teen or young adult or loves fantasy, this would be a good read for them. The story line between good and evil, the giving of second chances, the holding on to hope are all represented well. I especially liked the giving people a second chance story line, and how difficult that can be when you know no-one else feels that person is deserving.

I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.

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Rethink Food!

2011-03-26T11:55:00.000-07:00

The Spirit of Food: 34 Writers on Feasting and Fasting toward God by Leslie Leyland Fields

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I just really loved this book. As noted in the title, 34 writers submitted an essay about food, and at the end of most chapters a recipe is included. I seriously just want to start inviting people over to dinner.

It seems to me that eating has just become a task that we do. We feed our bodies in order to live, we feed our families because that's what we are supposed to do. But sharing a meal together is really a time of consecration.

This book will make you slow down, and really consider what sharing a meal is about. It's about God, who provided this earth and all that grows in it to sustain our bodies. Because He's God, He doesn't just provide us with boring sustenance, of course not! Our God is a lavishly loving God, and He gives us choices that satisfy our hearts and our bodies. We can create lovely pasta dinners, enjoy that tomato right out of the garden, make delicious breads and choose from a variety of meat choices (if we are so inclined).

I really appreciated that many of the authors pointed out, we need to start saying grace to God as soon as we start preparing our meals. We also need to thank and appreciate Him for the people who work so hard to provide those meals for us. We need to consider the choices we make when we buy our food. Are we buying food from people who are making responsible choices about the land and the animals that become the food on our table? Are we remembering that there are many people who do not have enough food to eat? Are we thankful when we eat, or are we just shoveling food into our mouths?

I don't think there was an essay I didn't like, but one of my favorite essays was "A Way of Loving" by Stephan and Karen Baldwin. They share the story of how they created an Italian meal from scratch, and how their daughter's friends were disoriented to see a meal created that was not out of a box. Not only that, but these teens didn't even know how to set a table. This meal became a gift of love and a lesson in dining for these kids. Karen and her family created a feast that included the little touches that dress up a table, like putting bread in a basket lined with a napkin. She endeavored to create a tone that said "this is a place to linger". I like that.

I also enjoyed "The Communion of Saints" by Jeanne Murray Walker. She writes about her visits to her local farmer's market and how it became a place of healing, or sanctuary for her.

This book is really about so much more than food. It's about creating communities of grace around our tables. In our fast paced society, this book will make you rethink food, and the companions that you share that food with.

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God's Words of Love

2011-03-13T13:42:00.001-07:00

I am so pleased to be able to review Ruth Myer's "31 Days of Drawing Near to God: Resting Securely in His Delight". After receiving the book I realized that I already had read it, although under a different title ("The Satisfied Heart"). This book then, will become a gift for someone special.

Many years ago my sister gave me Ruth Myer's "31 Days of Praise". I have gone through those 31 days so often that it is falling apart. Although the Praise book remains my favorite, Drawing Near to God is not far behind.

If you are a woman who has a lonely heart; a heart that longs for something more; or a heart that doesn't believe that God could possibly love you, no matter what, then I invite you to purchase this book and fall deeper into a love relationship with God.

We cannot love God and be in a deep and intimate relationship with Him if we don't put Him first. But, how can you fall in love with God if you don't know His words of love for you? You will find those words of love at the end of each day's devotion reading.

Each of the 31 days focuses on one of the many ways in which God loves us: Day 1: I Must Have Love; Day 2: He Can More than Satisfy Me; Day 7: I Am His Treasure; Day 13: Everything About Him Says Something About Me. Those words of love come at the end of the day in question, in the form of scripture readings. God uses people like Ruth Myer to talk to us and encourage us, but the best words are His words. The author knows this and her devotions and scripture illumine God's love for us.

Don't wait! God is calling you to Him, He longs to be in relationship with you. Listen to this quote from Hudson Taylor that is included in "Drawing Near to God"

"Who does not thirst? Who has not mind thirsts or heart-thirsts, soul-thirsts or body-thirsts? Well, no matter which, or whether I have them all, Come unto Me and . . . remain thirsty? Ah no! Come Unto Me and drink! What? Can Jesus meet my need? Yes, and more than meet it. No matter how intricate my path, how difficult my service; not matter how sad my bereavement, how far away my loved ones; no matter how helpless I am, how deep are my soul yearnings; Jesus can meet all--all, and more than meet."

The following are some of God's Words of Love from Day 2: He Can More Than Satisfy Me
John 7:37; Psalms 37:3-8, Psalms 52:8; Psalms 89:14-16; Psalms 103:1-5; 1 John 4:9-10

I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.

Piano Lessons

2011-03-11T18:02:00.001-08:00

Piano Lessons by Anna Goldsworthy

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I love music. I was brought up with it in my home as my mom played both the piano and the organ. Learning to play the piano was a struggle for me (I really never progressed much beyond being able to play some hymns and maybe 3 years of piano books?), so I really admire those who have the gift to bring such beautiful music out of the piano. I enjoyed "Piano Lessons" so much! Anna's portrayal of her teacher, Mrs. Sivan, and her own (Anna's) growth as a pianist is written in an engaging way. I particularly enjoyed how the author brought out Mrs. Sivan's desire for her students to hear the music and to play it with all the senses, not just to get the mechanics correct.

Early in the book Mrs. Sivan describes music as "logical fantasy". I loved that. What a great description. Additionally Mrs.Sivan instructs her student that "we are in dialogue with sounds". For me, music can really soothe my soul, or energize me while I'm about my work. I enjoyed how the teacher almost seemed to have known the composers as she taught their music to Anna. Mrs. Sivan is always emphasizing, "music comes from inside". I think that is what makes music beautiful to the listener.

Listen to what Mrs. Sivan says about Chopin and his B flat Minor Sonata:

"This sonata basically Chopin's requiem for himself. First movement starts with grave, and after all story begins. Second movement is about dance of life, busy busy busy, like in enormous excitement and anxiety. This is scherzo of life: joke in big sense. Why we have no time to sit down and listen, except when suddenly illness or something . . . and then comes third movement, funeral march. When you come through this music you will suddenly realize Chopin's own funeral, and he's watching to see how people will remember him."

This is how the piano teacher talks about composers, and playing the piano. The book is full of dialogue like this and I found myself charmed by the story.

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Life, In Spite of Me

2011-02-12T15:40:00.000-08:00

Life, In Spite of Me by Kristen Jane Anderson

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I was interested to read this book as my husband had heard the story on a Focus on the Family radio program. He had told me that it moved him to tears. Because of this I had pretty high expectations. I thought that the story was really going to capture my emotions. Instead, for the first half of the book, although Kristen was sharing details, I felt as though it was just a factual type story, and although very sad, it wasn't really capturing my heart. I actually put it down and started reading another book the next day. However, I picked it up again today, and have to say that I found the last half of the book very powerful. Kristen's yielding of her life to God, her trusting Him with all the details of her life, and the way God used the people He put in her life to prove His faithfulness were inspiring. Her willingness to be totally vulnerable, share her story, and to use that story to encourage and make a difference in other people's lives is a testament to her faith. I wonder if the first half of the book wasn't so meaningful to me because I didn't have the sort of life experiences that Kristen had? At any rate, once you read the end you will definitely find a young woman who desires to give her life to God and to submit to His plan for her.

I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.

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The Gold Dress

2011-02-03T14:58:00.000-08:00

I've recently returned from a cruise to the Caribbean. Other than Canada, which is vastly different from the Caribbean, my husband and I had never been out of the states before. First time for a passport, first time for a cruise, first time we've spent so much money on a vacation. All our previous vacations were pretty thrifty, we hiked, we looked for good deals on vrbo (vacation rental by owner), we often made our own meals. This year we splurged for two reasons: 1) a friend lost his wife unexpectedly. I wanted my husband and I to do something special before it was too late for us, and 2) basically, I felt I deserved a great vacation like this. I have had some struggles, and, it's time for my reward.

Our seven night cruise had two formal nights. Being a woman, I naturally felt I needed a new dress for this occasion, not only to show off my tan, but because we reached a milestone 30 years in our marriage.

A funny thing happened as we prepared for our vacation though, and it's basically all because of a book and that gold dress.

In an earlier post I shared that I read Radical by David Platt. I started not feeling so good about spending all that money on a vacation when I could be using that money for God. I could go to Africa, India, or China. I could donate my dollars to the mission, a needy family, the church. And, no excusing not doing any of those things because I deserve a good vacation. There is no-where in the Bible where God says, "feed the widow, but, take your vacation first".

Also, my dress, which I made, wasn't coming along so smoothly. The pattern isn't actually made for altering, and, being 6'1", it needed to be altered. Got that figured out, and then I just couldn't quite understand how the lining was supposed to work. Took it apart about 4 times before I finally got it right. Then, I tried it on, and the invisible zipper looked more like an "S" curve than the straight line it was supposed to be, and it was hanging all crookedy on me. Frustration! About this time I'm thinking to myself that I really didn't need a new dress, I had some perfectly good dressy clothes that would be fine for formal night. Stubbornly I kept on, and was finally successful. The gold, lined, designer dress, that would have cost me $350 plus in the store, I made for $55 and a lot of frustration.

I think God must feel a lot about me like I felt about that dress. He remains faithful to me, while I'm altering His plan and trying about 6 different ways other than the way He's been prompting me to go. I show the world "Barb in the gold dress", and He sees me in the crookedy dress and still loves me. He is stubborn about me too--He's not going to give up on making me into the Holy woman He created me to be (even though I may fight Him at every turn).

What about that vacation though? I still went on the cruise, and had a fabulous time. It was great to be pampered and be waited on hand and foot, never have to even think about making a meal, or where to go to eat. It was very decadent--you leave your room and when you come back, your bed is made up. You can eat 24 hours a day. All you really have to do is think how you will spend your time and the crew does the rest. I'd like to tell you I was ready to get back to real life on my return, but sadly, that would not be true.

I do want to think more deeply about how I'm using my money. When I consider what I do in my life, or where I vacation I want to ask God first for His leading. I want to honor Him in all my decisions, and I want to somehow promote and support more justice for people who have not been as blessed as I am financially, and who do not have spiritual freedom. I would like to surrender more of myself to God--actually, I would like to fully surrender myself to God. Just saying that out loud feels risky.

Do you know the song "Healing Rain" by Michael W. Smith? Well, in the chorus it says:

Healing rain, it comes with fire,
so let it fall and take us higher,
Healing rain I'm not afraid,
to be washed in Heaven's rain

I've been thinking about this song, and wondering about that sentence "healing rain, I'm not afraid". At first blush you think, why would we be afraid of healing rain? But here's the why. God really does want all of me. He doesn't mince words in His book - He says "leave your family and follow me". He says, "leave your friends and come to My banquet table". He says "take up your cross and follow me". That calls for complete surrender. That calls for the willingness to be healed (give up that temptation that you're hiding in secret, love that neighbor you can't stand). That calls for passionate followers of Christ. Let's face it, that calls for sacrifice.

This is on my heart a lot lately. Am I willing?

There is a part of me that is afraid. What will He ask? I think He is close to asking me something. Will I hear? How will I know it's Him? Will I obey? Will I accept His passport to the life He wants to give me? (Isaiah 35:8)

Trusting God to Turn Me into Me - A Review of Soul Print

2011-01-31T15:31:00.000-08:00

I have to be honest - I wasn't thrilled with the "Blogging for Books" book picks this time. The main reason I choose this book "SoulPrint: Discovering Your Divine Destiny", was the publish date of 1/18/2011. I figured it was new enough that I might as well check it out. From the book description, I was expecting a self-help sort of book, and was prepared to be disappointed. Boy was I wrong! Right from the start the author lets us know that this isn't about me helping me, but about God molding me.

"It's not just who you are, present tense. It's who you are destined to become, future tense. It's not just who others see when they look at you from the outside in. It's who God has destined you to become from the inside out . . . so while you live your life forward, God works backward. The Omniscient One always starts with the end in mind."

My problem is, I want to know the end NOW!

I was so pleased to find out how Bible based this book was. The author focuses on the life of David for his illustrations, and scripture is sprinkled throughout. We are reminded that nothing is accidental in our lives, but that God has a purpose and plan to turn us into the men and women He created us to be.

Chapter two focuses on 'lifesymbols'. Batterson says:

"Lifesymbols are all about seeing the purposes of God in our past circumstances . . . our memories can either empower us to live by faith or imprison us to live by fear".

We need to examine our pasts so we can remember God's faithfulness--trusting God through this type of remembering can help us to be at peace and trust Him with our present circumstances.

Another chapter that appealed to me was chapter 4 on 'alter ego'. We need to be authentic, and that means being vulnerable, and that feels like risk. Batterson reminds us:

"The church ought to be a place where we can confess our deepest doubts, worst sins, and wildest dreams. It ought to be a place where we can reveal who we really are--the good, the bad, and the ugly. Unfortunately church is often a place where we act like everything is okay even though it isn't okay. And that lack of authenticity forces everyone to hide behind their royal robes. But what if it were a place where people had the courage to disrobe?"

What a great question! Wouldn't the church look different if we all did just that?

This book has me pondering my past and present circumstances. I intend to remember God's faithfulness through my past, and possibly even create some sort of lifesymbol art to remind me that only He is God. As I continue my struggle to find my place in this world, I will trust that He is showing me the way, even though I cannot see it.

I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.

There is No Plan B

2010-12-27T06:05:00.000-08:00

I have just finished reading "Radical: Taking Back Your Faith from the American Dream" by David Platt (the link will take you to an excerpt of the 1st chapter). I'm not quite sure how to start--for me, this book creates a feeling in me similar to The Hole in our Gospel by Richard Stearns and Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire by Jim Cymbala. I don't know how you can read any of these books, and not have some sort of fire lit within you.

Platt has written a no holds barred book about what Jesus has called us to do--as he says in chapter seven

We are the plan of God, and there is no Plan B

Really think about that a minute. We are the plan of God, there is no Plan B. Are we really living as though what we say and do is critical to God's plan for the world? The premise of the book is that churches, both the buildings themselves and us, the people who make the church, have succumbed to the American Dream that stuff equals happiness, that large and full churches equals fulfilling the gospel plan, that marketing equals sharing the gospel. We have watered down God to church attendance and Bible Study attendance. We have limited God's purpose for the world by our complacency, and Platt wants to open our eyes wide to what it really means to be a follower of Jesus. What does it mean? Look to chapter 4:

Meanwhile, Jesus commands us to go. He has created each of us to take the gospel to the ends of the earth, and I propose that anything less than radical devotion to this purpose is unbiblical Christianity

Wow, those are strong words, but, I have to agree that is what Jesus tells us to do, "Go and make disciples of the nations". I have to ask myself, am I doing that, in even a small way? And, the message seems so large, and well, radical. Yet, that is what God asks us to do, isn't it? To live for Him in a radical way. He did tell us we would be strangers in this world - am I living as though I am a stranger in this world? Am I living as though Heaven is my real world, and not earth? Am I, even in small ways at work and home, fulfilling God's mission for this world? I like that Platt doesn't just leave us hanging, he gives us some practical ways to begin. I also like that he doesn't leave any excuses for not making a beginning, and that he awakens a desire in you to be the man or woman God created us to be.

Platt leaves us with a one year challenge, a challenge to become more of who God created us to be:

Pray for the entire world;
Read through the entire Word;
sacrifice your money for a specific purpose;
spend your time in another context (impact communities, nations, world for the glory of Christ);
commit your life to a multiplying community (join a community of faith, take up your cross and follow Him)

I once heard a story about a nun who had a vision of Jesus. If I remember correctly she saw Jesus in a church, His hands were tied behind His back, and He was weeping. I don't want to be a person who leaves Jesus ineffective in my world. I want my words and actions to honor Him. I want your words and actions to honor Him. I want to encourage you, and I want you to encourage me. This is what Radical will propel you towards. So friends (you know who you are), if you end up reading this, please call me so we can have book club and talk about how we can allow the Holy Spirit to radically change us to fulfill God's plan.

I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review

2010-12-26T14:47:00.000-08:00

A Romance on Three Legs: Glenn Gould's Obsessive Quest for the Perfect Piano by Katie Hafner

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I first learned about this book from the Barnes and Noble week in review. As a child who grew up with a piano playing mother and a baby grand piano in her home, I was intrigued. As noted in the title, the book is based on piano player Glenn Gould and his search for the perfect piano.

I enjoyed this book so much. I didn't know the history of the piano and the people who tuned and played them was so interesting.

The Steinway piano began with a cabinet maker who built a piano in his home in Seesen Germany, built a successful piano company there, and then emigrated to the US. Eventually this cabinetmaker and his family created Steinway and Sons. They not only built quality pianos, but they marketed them in such a way that a girl was not considered accomplished unless she could play the piano.
Blind people (primarily men and boys) were trained to tune pianos--you wanted a blind person to tune your piano as they were more attuned to the "voice" of the instrument. We follow the story of Verne Edquist from Saskatchawan, from a dirt poor family, whose mother could not support him. He had less than 10% of his vision, and local community members pooled their money so that he could be sent to a school for a blind, which eventually led to his becoming an accomplished piano tuner. He heard colors in sounds, and I loved how that came out in his story and in his experience in tuning pianos.
Then we have Glenn Gould. When Glenn was three, his parents discovered that he had perfect pitch. He could read music before he could read words. When five, he played the piano in public for the first time. At age 14 he played for the first time with the Toronto Symphony. Due to his upbringing, and some obsessive compulsive type behaviors, he was a rather odd performer, but that did not detract from his fame or his ability.
CD 318 is the piano that most met his needs, and that he did most of his recordings on. He really loved this piano as thought it was his friend.

This book weaves all the above points into a highly readable account. One thing that I think is amazing is how you have these 2 characters that are a bit odd, Verne Edquist and Glenn Gould, and how they come together in a partnership that lets CD 318 "sing". I also find it interesting that so many artists, musical or otherwise, have these odd tics that are a part of them. Is their oddity what gives their art such beauty? Think of the artists you known that struggle with alcohol, drugs, phobias and yet have left the world with lasting treasures.

Part of the Christian message is that brokenness leads to wholeness, and I always wonder about this part in the artist's journey. Here also, we have distinctly different lives, and yet,they hold hands for the unique time and space that allows this artist to shine. It is difficult for me to keep God out of that, although He does not seem to be given credit for the gifts He bestowed.

I have been intrigued to learn more about Glenn Gould, downloading his recordings from itunes, and checking out some videos on youtube. I encourage you to do the same.

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2010-12-22T18:48:00.000-08:00

The Postmistress by Sarah Blake

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This book hooked me in right from the beginning. "What would you think of a postmistress who chose not to deliver the mail?" Frankie Bard asks, and captures the attention of everyone at her dinner table. When they find out it's true, and that it happened 1941 during the war, they are shocked. It is from this beginning that the story unfolds.

It is a story of war and of love told from the eyes of several people, mainly Frankie Bard, reporter and Iris James, Postmaster of Franklin, Massachusetts. You are taken from the bomb shelters of Britain, to the trains of Europe that hold the Jews who are trying to escape and back to Franklin, Massachusetts where the townspeople hear Frankie's stories of war on the radio. They listen, but with that suspension of disbelief that comes from being on the edge of a story and not living the story itself. We live on the outside of so many stories don't we? We don't pay attention to the details and clues that might come our way and help us to help someone else escape from the story that they are in. I think that happens because we are afraid--if we get too far into another person's story, we might be changed. Perhaps we, like Dr. Fitch in the story, might say

We are all of us here in the mess. There's no way around it. And all I am in the face of it is a single voice and a pair of hands. Not anyone's son anymore. Not anyone's husband. Anonymous but necessary. Vital. A Lucky Strike.

The people and stories in "The Postmistress" were real to me. I wanted to know what was going to happen to them. In fact, I cheated, as I often do, and read the ending before I finished the book because I just had to know.

Once you've finished reading you might want to check out the author interview. I would definitely wait until you were finished with the book though, or the story may be ruined for you.

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Cleopatra: Vixon or Brilliant?

2010-12-05T10:08:00.000-08:00

Cleopatra: A Life by Stacy Schiff

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

When I finished reading this book, I thought, oh, it was okay. But then I started telling a friend about it, and decided I like it much more than I thought. It is fascinating to me that there are really no images of Cleopatra, only her coin portraits are accepted as authentic. So here we have a woman, who

ruled Egypt for twenty-two years. She lost a kingdom once, regained it,nearly lost it again, amassed an empire, lost it all. A goddess as a child, a queen at eighteen . . . at the height of her power she controlled virtually the entire eastern Mediterranean coast, the last great kingdom of any Egyptian ruler

In a way, this book is a myth buster. Consider what you know about Cleopatra. This is what I knew - she was a queen, she was beautiful, she killed herself by allowing herself to be bitten by a snake. Guess what, all of this was wrong in some degree.

She was a more than a queen, she styled herself as a goddess, and was considered a deity.
From correspondence of her time we know that she was not a stunning beauty, but a great conversationalist and highly intelligent - go figure, a woman who is loved for her mind!
The cause of her death still leaves room for speculation, but it is thought to have been from poison, not from a snake bite.
Cleopatra spoke 9 languages - 9! One of them Egyptian, which shouldn't have been a surprise other than the fact that her family was not really Egyptian at all, but rather Macedonian Greek.

I learned a lot about Cleopatra, Egypt, Rome, and the history of those empires in this book. As is often the case with successful, brilliant women, her accomplishments were attributed to the men she associated herself with. This book sets the record straight.

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2010-11-21T18:16:00.001-08:00

Becoming Odyssa: Epic Adventures on the Appalachian Trail by Jennifer Pharr Davis

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Thank you Goodreads for your monthly contests, and for this book. I was interested "Becoming Odyssa" because my husband and I have hiked parts of the Appalachian Trail, most often in Tennessee. It was fun to have firsthand knowledge of some of the areas the author hiked, most notably Unicoi Gap and Clingman's Dome. I enjoyed the second half of the book more than the first half. I felt like the author became more real, or more vulnerable in her writing as the book progressed.

I always like books about strong women, and this book is no exception. For a 21 year old to hike the trail alone takes courage and endurance. "Odyssa" proved she had both. She persevered through some really hard days, made good friends, learned a lot about her faith and herself. Having hiked some mountain trails, over paths made of tree roots, boulders and stones myself, I felt I could understand her challenges to a certain degree. I am so impressed that she hiked for over 2,000 miles, in rain, snow, bugs and never gave up. She pushed her body to the limits and became strong both mentally and physically. I loved how she became more in tune with nature, saying

The trail allowed me to feel a strong sense of freedom. And it helped me to see the oppression of a busy schedule and the way we multitask in civilization. I no longer saw what was civil about filling my life with commitments if I couldn't stop to watch the sunset or listen to the birds sing." She goes on to reflect, "the problem in college, and in life, was that there were a lot of people who knew what I was, but they didn't know who I was.

Although the illustrations in the book were lovely, I wish there had been actual photos, I was curious to know what the author looked like. I did peek at her photo on the back cover about halfway through the book. She looked so joyful--I felt like that joy came out as she moved forward on her journey.

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The Sound of Many Waters

2010-11-07T12:13:00.000-08:00

We were at a wedding this past weekend in a very unique venue. The bride and groom were married at Meijer Gardens in what I believe is one of the butterfly rooms. The temperature was tropical, the plants were lush, small birds occasionally flitted by, and there was a small waterfall that gurgled during the ceremony. It was difficult to hear the preacher, you had to listen really hard to hear her voice over the water. She spoke about the hard work of marriage, being each others strength, and the fact that as Jesus was at the wedding where he performed the first miracle, turning the water into wine, and turning disaster into joy, so He is here with us at this wedding. I was reminded about how much of marriage is about forgiveness and grace, and what a challenge it is to actually live what Jesus calls us to live. Sometimes, every day is a starting over. I'm always so grateful that God remembers that we are dust, and that we who are believers have passed from judgment into life.

As we left the wedding the thing that most stuck in my head was how difficult it had been to hear the message due to the waterfall. It wasn't a large waterfall at all, probably 3 to 4 feet high. In fact it was more like water falling over rocks in multiple trickles than an actual waterfall. It made me think of Revelation 1:15, where God's voice is described as the sound of many running waters. I always pictured God's voice as being a Niagara Falls type voice, but now, I'm not so sure. I had to listen really hard to hear the preacher at all. The falling water, although beautiful, became annoying and distracting to me. Perhaps "the sound of many waters" just means that when God speaks all other sounds will disappear. His voice will be so compelling that we will desire to hear Him and nothing else. Then the noise that we currently live in, and flow toward, will take it's rightful place as an annoyance and distraction from God. We will physically walk in the garden with God as our friend and companion, He will call us "Beloved" and we will be at peace.

Fall in the Smoky Mountains

2010-11-03T18:08:00.001-07:00

In October we went back to one of my favorite places in the world - the Smoky Mountains. We always stay near the park, and enjoy visiting our favorite haunts - Cade's Cover, Roaring Forks Motor Trail, and an annual trek down main street of Gatlinburg. This year, we rented from Highland Condos, which is nestled in the mountains just above Gatlinburg. Our little deck area looked over the mountains and down on the city of Gatlinburg.

We had a sweet little lawn area to our right as we looked over the mountains. It was such fun for us to be witness to two weddings that took place there. The first wedding happened on Friday afternoon. It was so simple and sweet - the bride work black dress pants and a sheer striped blouse with a camisole underneath and a short veil. She carried a simple posy bouquet. Her two children were allowed to be children, by which I mean they were doing some chatting and wandering during the ceremony. I loved how the pastor spoke to them about how they were to obey and honor their parents, not just now, but all of their lives, and had them speak the promise. He explained to them that their parents were still children as well and that God still expected them to honor their parents too. I heard him say to the bride and groom that if they ever had any problems, no matter what the time of day or night, that they should call him and he would help. The second wedding was on Saturday, and the bride and groom wore the traditional wedding gown and tuxedo.

On Saturday as well, we planned to take a hike to the jump-off (a trail off the Appalachian Trail). We headed out for what we thought would be a leisurely day. However, partway up the mountain, smoke began puffing out of the front of the car as though it were a dragon gasping for air. This was not good. We finally pulled off by one of the many areas that they make for visitors to the mountains. Ron was not happy and took a walk down the mountain. I sat in the car and prayed. All kinds of things were going through my head - like, how do we get a tow truck to get us down the mountain! God sent a traveler though, a nice little man, somewhat portly, who was wearing black dress pants and a long sleeve black/white checked shirt. His wife was in their vehicle wearing a navy polyester pant suit. In his little ole southern twang he asked if we needed assistance - I called my husband back out of the mountain, while saying to this gentleman, please don't get yourself dirty, it looks like you are going somewhere special! But no, he said, we're just out foolin around. When he left he added this pithy remark - I never travel without a gallon of water and vise grips. So, with the help of this traveler, we added water to the reservoir, and headed back down the mountain. We were lucky to make it! As we were waiting for help at the service station, Ron started adding water - it was coming out as fast as it was coming in! As a result we had to be towed to Sevierville. This could have been a rotten day, but some of the events made it pleasurable for me. The first event, obviously was my portly gentleman. The second thing was the language of the tow truck driver - no, it wasn't bad language, but it was old fashioned language. My husband and I had been talking about sighting animals in the Cade's Cove area and he remarked that the best time was "in the light of the evening". Isn't that pretty. I just loved that. My husband said to me, "no-one talks like that anymore", and then, in a rare moment of understanding, he looked at me and said "that's why you like it, isn't it!" Yes indeed!

The next fun thing was at our service station in Sevierville. I was talking to the manager, Josh, and a delivery man came in with just a small package to deliver. I stopped talking and just looked at him--I watched him put down the package, and turn around to leave. I turned around to watch him leave. I turned back to Josh and whispered in astonishment "he looks just like Elvis!" Josh just started giggling while telling me that he is an Elvis impersonator on the side! Really! This is true! I started giggling as well and so regret that I did not react fast enough to take his picture with my phone and post it on facebook! Unfortunately Elvis is a little shorter, a little fatter and a little older! The service station people were so helpful, and called all around trying to find us a car to rent with no luck. We finally ended up walking to the Enterprise rental place, 2 miles down the road, and were fortunately able to rent a truck. Ron loved his truck, and it was fun to tour the mountains with it.
Our budget vacation didn't end up too budget what with a $120 towing charge, $470 vehicle repair and $150 truck rental, but we were not hurt, the colors were beautiful, and we were not at work, so, all in all I feel like God took care of us very well!

Holiness, Love, Robin Hood, Banners and Arby's

2010-10-03T14:07:00.000-07:00

Have you ever had a time, or times, in your life where it feels like God is having a conversation with you? That's one of the times I am in right now. I've just come out of a period in my life where I've had to really work to live one of the basic tenants that I believe, which is: everyone deserves to be treated with respect. I have had such a very difficult time putting this into practice.

In addition to the challenge of living this, I've struggled with God's mandate to love our neighbor as ourselves. It seems like, as a Christian, with a new Spirit put in me, that I ought to have been able to overcome the failings in my human nature to walk this path with joy. Instead, the path has been lonely, full of stumblings and the feeling of letting people and God down.

There are some bright sides to this path though, and I don't want to lose the light that I've gained. I stuck with God. I learned to not just talk to God, but to let Him be my confidante and best friend. I learned to say, there is nothing, nothing, that can fill my empty places except for my relationship with God himself. I learned to shut my mouth (well, a lot of the times anyway), and to talk to God before I reacted to some of those rough spots in my path. I learned that "I" had to get out of the way, and say to God (with some desperation) every day, "I can't do this, You must help me". Every day God proved His faithfulness enabling me to make it through with some success. This is what I don't want to lose. I don't want to lose the fact that even now, when my path is getting easier, that only God can get me through. Only God can fill those empty places.

So, what does this have to do with holiness, love, Robin Hood and banners?

I'm reading two new books. The first, 66 Love Letters: A Conversation With God That Invites you Into His Story by Dr. Larry Crabb reminds me with every chapter, that God did not EVER promise us a trouble-free life. This wonderful book takes each chapter of the Bible as though it was a love letter from God. Each chapter begins with the author saying to God, "What are you saying to me God", and then (love this part), pretty much complaining about the hard stuff God wants us to do and learn. God answers the questions and invites us deeper into the story at the end of each chapter. The basic premise is, God wants us to be Holy. The only way He seems to get us to pay attention to Him is when we are in a time of brokenness. God will do whatever He has to do to get our attention and get us to His party. So, my stumbles have, hopefully, made me a mite more ready for God's party.

The second book I'm reading is through a church initiative: The Relationship Principles of Jesus by Tom Holladay and Rick Warren. This book focuses on the first two Commandments: Love the Lord Your God with your heart, soul and mind, and (this is key), your neighbor as yourself. I'm enjoying it much more than I thought, and, it also affirms my struggle to love (or even like) people that I'd just as soon not have a relationship with. But, there's no getting away from it. This is what God calls us to do. It too, is hard, but necessary.

So, now to Robin Hood. We watched the new Russell Crowe version this weekend. I really liked it. I don't know, there's something about these movie sagas (Lord of the Rings, Gladiator) that appeals to my imagination. Something about their good over evil theme attracts me. So, I'm watching Robin Hood, and they're going to war with their banners waving, and the streams of soldiers and horses, and I'm thinking, we should go to church waving some sort of Christian banner. Maybe the pomp and circumstance of it would be a fitting display of how we are all for Jesus.

So, I'm stuck on this idea for a while, and then I think of my books, and how God calls us to holiness and love. And I think, oh yes! God says, "love your neighbor as yourself". God says "the world will know you by your love for me and for each other". Well, that means that "Love" should be the banner I'm waving every day. Kind of like that Arby's sign over the roast beef lover's head. Only I love GOD, not some stupid roast beef sandwich! My sign of love ought to be much more obvious. I have a feeling that I look like the goat in this picture way more often than I look like a holy woman! So people, be patient with me in my more "goatish" moments--start singing "His Banner Over Me is Love" and remind me Who I belong to.

Remembering and Propinquity

2010-08-27T16:11:00.001-07:00

Propinquity is a new word for me. I learned it in a fascinating book I'm reading titled Influencer: The Power to Change Anything. The book itself, as it suggests, is about influencing people to change, and perhaps I'll blog about that another time. But for now, I want to focus on "propinquity". Aside from the fact that I just like the way it sounds, I've found myself thinking about this word quite a lot. Webster gives it two meanings: 1) nearness of blood, or kinship, and 2) nearness in place or time.

The authors suggest that we should consider propinquity when we look at our work and our home spaces. Remember when you were growing up and your family ate dinner together, watched TV shows together, hung out in the family room together? We had a lot of propinquity right? We maybe didn't want to be near to each other time, but we were. Family rituals, good and bad, happened around the kitchen table. The authors shared that dining room tables are disappearing from homes at an astonishing rate. They suggest that:

the dining room table is a significant facilitator of family togetherness and that when you do away with the table, families lose a large portion of family togetherness time.

What happened? Behold, the microwave. No longer do families need to spend time together preparing meals, they just warm it up, or pop the meal itself in, the microwave. Do your children have TVs in their rooms? More than likely yes. So, no more family time (or fights) about what to watch on TV. I think also, because more families have both mom and dad working, or, a single mom or dad, we just don't really want to put the time into the negotiations involved into finding a program that everyone wants to watch. We're tired and don't feel like making a meal that involves actual meal preparation, or waiting for your teenager to get home from soccer practice so you can all eat together. Even now, when my kids are gone, my husband and I don't eat at the table, instead we plant ourselves in our easy chairs and listen to the news. It's rather sad isn't it?

Do you know what made me think of all this? As I was sitting in my chair, waiting for my husband to come home from work, I heard a mom outside calling for her kids. That brought back such memories. When I was young, we didn't call up our friends on the phone, we went to their house, probably the back door, and called out their name. "Juuuu-lie" And her mom would call out, "Julie's not home right now", or "Julie, Barb's here". It seems almost comical now, but that's how we made plans with our friends. Of course back then (I sound so old), we didn't need to phone our friends, we could walk or ride our bikes to their house.

I don't know that I really have a point here, other than that you should strive to make the space in your home a space that invites propinquity--keep that dining room table and create kinship within your family and with your friends.

Becoming Real

2010-07-15T18:04:00.000-07:00

Becoming real . . . the Bible tells us that when we fall in love with Jesus we "strip ourselves of our former nature [put off and discard your old unrenewed self] which characterized your previous manner of life, and becomes corrupt through lusts and desires that spring from delusion." Ephesians 4:22

I like what David Muyskens writes:

This new self is who we really are. We have a case of mistaken identity and work under the illusion that the old self is who we really are.

C. S. Lewis says:

The real Son of God is at your side. He is beginning to turn you into the same kind of thing as Himself. He is beginning, so to speak, to "inject" His kind of thought and life, His "zoe" (life) into you; beginning to turn the tin soldier into a live man. The part of you that does not like it is the part that is still tin. (Mere Christianity)

I can't improve on these two gentlemen, so I'll just say, it is challenging work, to become real!

The Inside is Bigger Than It's Outside

2010-07-12T17:08:00.000-07:00

A new heart I will give you, and a new spirit I will put within you.
Ezekial 36:26

This week my Bible study corresponds to my exercise in walking closer to God every day. I have a lot of thoughts floating through my head. Let's see if I can make sense of them. Ezekial tells us that God will sprinkle clean water on us, and we'll be clean from all our uncleanness, and we won't have any idols any more in our lives. Nothing or no-one to take us away from our closeness with God. As a result God gives us a new heart and a new spirit. He takes away our stony hearts and gives us a heart of flesh. Not sure exactly what that means, but I'm pretty sure in some way He makes me nicer than I really am!

Bible study is on Revelation focusing this week on how we as Christians are sealed with the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is a "guarantee of our inheritance" (Eph. 1:13-14), we are "branded as Gods' own, secured for the the day of redemption" (Eph. 4:30) and we are appropriated as God's by "His seal on us and giving us His Holy Spirit in our hearts as a security deposit". Seems as though you can't have a new heart unless you are indeed sealed with the Holy Spirit, doesn't it? But, there's more! 2 Timothy 2:19 tells us "The Lord knows who are His, let all who names himself by the name of the Lord give up all iniquity and stand aloof from it" (scripture is from Amplified Bible). There's still more! 2 Timothy 2:20-21 gives us a little homily on how every home has vessels for special occasions, or honorable and noble use, and then vessels for menial and ignoble use. Guess what. If we are consecrated to the Master (God), then we become vessels for honorable and noble use. Further, if we are truly God's then we have His name on us and will have His seal on our foreheads to identify us as His own (Revelation 7:3). It's like a vast and wonderful story that you can't quite understand. But that's okay with me - I rather like the mystery of it. Which, now that I think of it is kind of weird cuz I really like to know what's happening in my life, both right now and in the future.

As I was thinking about this The Last Battle, the last of the Narnia stories by C. S. Lewis popped into my head. This is such a good story, and my favorite of the series. It's so hard to describe if you haven't read the story, but I'll try. It is the end times for Narnia. There is a great battle waging between good and evil and it appears as though the good will capitulate to the evil as they are cornered and forced into a little stable. But, here is the mystery and the wonder! Once inside the stable, where you'd expect darkness and defeat, there is instead light, and open air and comfort and beauty. In this new country then, you cannot see the stable itself, but only the door to the stable. If you peek into this door, you can still see the darkness of the old world.

Tirian says "it seems, then, that the Stable seen from within and the Stable seen from without are two different places." "Yes", said the Lord Digory. "Its inside is bigger than its outside". "Yes, said Queen Lucy. "In our world too, a Stable once had something inside it that was bigger than our whole world."

I think this is what it's like to have the Holy Spirit it you. It is bigger than our outside and makes us bigger than we can be without it. It's our seal, but also our, what shall I call it? I think I'll call it our "courage maker". It's what gives me the courage to forgive when I don't want to, stand up for what is right when all are against me, strive to become a Holy woman of God when really, it is just easier to be lazy. God, through His Holy Spirit, makes me bigger than I am, at least on my good days. On my bad days, I just pick myself up and try again!

Barb Thumb

2010-07-06T14:41:00.000-07:00

For God alone my soul waits in silence; from Him comes my salvation. Psalm 62: 1

What an interesting prayer practice today! I am going to have to try this again and again because I couldn't quite get past "opening the door", so to speak.

"Imagine that you are the size of your thumb and able to enter the vast interior of your soul. Go deep within and explore what is there. Be aware that you have entered a holy place, the dwelling of the Spirit ofChrist. Stay there, and allow that entire space to fill with the love of God." from Forty Days to A Closer Walk With God.

I imagined that my soul was my heart, and that I walked in the door of my heart to be with God. It was to my mind like entering a very private and secret place. I was awed that God would meet me there. It sort of made me want to cry, but in the way that you feel when your emotions are too overcome to give expression. Not sure if that makes sense or not. Tozer and MacDonald both make reference to having a private place to meet with God. Tozer says:

From [humanity's] standpoint the most tragic loss suffered in the Fall was the vacating of the inner sanctum by the Spirit of God. . . .For so intimately private is the place that no creature can intrude; no one can enter but Christ, and He will enter only by the invitation of faith.

MacDonald says:

As the fir-tree lifts up itself with a far different need from the need of the palm-tree, so does each man stand before God, and lift up a different humanity to the common Father. And for each God has a different response. With every man he has a secret--the secret of a new name. In every man there is a loneliness, an inner chamber of peculiar life into which God only can enter. . . From this it follows that there is a chamber also--(O God, humble and accept my speech)--a chamber in God himself, into which none can enter but the one, the individual, the peculiar man,--out of which chamber that man has to bring revelation and strength for his brethren. This is that for which he was made--to reveal the secret things of the Father. - Unspoken Sermons: The New Name

I love that. A special place for me in God, and a special place for God in me.

He knows my Needs

2010-07-05T17:41:00.000-07:00

Matthew 6: 8b
For your Father knows what you need before you ask Him.

Isn't it nice to be known? It is not easy for me to let just anyone know me. There is a good book by Susan Howatch called Glittering Images which is about a bishop that hides his real self from the world, his wife, and his church. I think we're all a lot like that. I show you the nice and helpful Barb, but, be warned, there's a perfectly witchy Barb inside (just ask my husband). I don't find it easy to show my real self to a lot of people. That takes a lot of vulnerability, a lot of risk. If I show you my real self, and I trust you with my real self, and I love you with my real love--well, you may disappoint me. You may betray me. You could hurt me. That's scary. But, my Father, now He knows me. He sees all the way down to the marrow of me. He knows what I need before I ask Him. He even knows I'm going to be crabby at Him because He and I don't agree on what's good for me. But still, but still . . . He knows, and He still loves, and He promises never to disappoint. I like that He knows me like that. I like that my every thought, action, purpose is exposed to Him. It's weird in a way, cuz I know what He sees and it isn't good! But what a comfort, that He knows and He still loves.

Secret Prayer Equals Open Rewards

2010-06-29T16:45:00.000-07:00

Matthew 6:6
But when you pray, go into your [most] private room, and, closing the door, pray to your Father, Who is in secret; and your Father, Who sees in secret, will reward you in the open.

I haven't been much of a contemplative lately, no time and no peace! Tonight, though, is a quiet night; Ron is out golfing, the weather is beautiful, so, after a walk to the beach I was able to find some quiet time with God. I need it! Life is swirling around me and a little peace and quiet with God is critical.

The homily in Forty Days to a Closer Walk with God for today was on Centering Prayer, and finding a sacred word to bring your wandering thoughts back into communion with God. It was suggested that you ask God for a sacred word, so I did. I thought He must be mistaken after I received it, but turns out it is a perfect word for me. I can't tell you what it is though, it is a secret between me and Him. It's also suggested that you find a quiet place to just sit and commune with God. Easy to do tonight as I'm home alone. The only problem was, that I really had to chant that sacred word because my mind is racing to and fro and cannot settle in to just being quiet with God. What good is a quiet room without a quiet mind? I hope with practice and a continued desire to know God more I can learn the art of centering prayer.

Isn't the scripture for today great though? I never noticed before that "the Father, who sees in secret, will reward you in the open". An encouragement for life's journey. He sees the secret bad things too, but these He can turn to good when we let Him! It's the letting Him change me part that's hard. Turning my independence into dependence on Him will certainly require years of prayer, centering or not!

Abundant Fruit

2010-06-20T16:20:00.000-07:00

I am the Vine. You are the branches.
Whoever lives in Me and I in him bears much (abundant) fruit. However, apart from Me [cut off from vital union with Me] you can do nothing. John 15:5

I would like to live a life that shows that I have a vital union with Jesus. I know that when I am cut off from Him I can do nothing. I know that I must continually be nourished by Him to have even a small showing of His abundance in my life. I think that one of the nicest things about being in Heaven is that I won't have to strive to be good anymore. I won't have to be tempted to do the not so nice thing and have internal arguments with myself pushing myself towards doing the right thing. I won't have to struggle. I know that God clearly tells us that our struggle is a part of His cutting away those pesky branches that don't bear fruit, but really, it is so tiring and draining. And don't you find it just hard sometimes figuring out exactly what it is God wants you to do? As I wrote that I had to kind of laugh at myself because God clearly tells us to love Him first, and our neighbor second. Rats! That just isn't always an easy!

A friend recently left a message on my phone. It said this: "God is Sovereign, just wanted you to remember that". It's been a message that has been sticking with me. There are circumstances in my life that have been draining my spirit. In my morning prayers, I am continually asking God to: nourish me with His body (John 6:57), make me like a watered garden (Isaiah 58:11), let me drink of Him (John 4:14), to dwell between my shoulders (Deut. 33:12), illumine me with the Holy Spirit (sadly, lost the scripture to that one), and to be yoked with me (Matthew 11:29). I usually end up saying you know God, I just can't do this, You say You're turning me into gold, really, I don't think I'm getting there. I don't feel like people are seeing Your Light when they see me. I'm trusting that little glimmers of You are somehow shining through.

If you've seen the movie "Ghost", you'll remember the scene where Whoopi Goldburg's body is all of a sudden, whoosh, inhabited by the spirit of Sam Wheat, the dead husband. That's what God needs to do with me every day, whoosh, just take me over.

If I could learn the discipline of abiding, I wouldn't need such drastic measures!

Pause and Calmly Think of That

2010-06-15T17:04:00.000-07:00

The reading for day 4 is Psalm 46. It's funny, but one of the things I like best about my amplified Bible is the way they expand the word "selah"--pause, and calmly think of that. (In case you wondered, like me, the right pronunciation, it is see-lah),

So, for example:

The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our Refuge (our Fortress and High Tower). Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]! (v. 7)
The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our Refuge (our High Tower and Stronghold). Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]! (v. 11)

I even like how they put a comma after the word pause, it actually makes you stop and pause.

The whole Psalm is worthwhile pausing and thinking about actually. My favorite verses are 4 and 5:

There is a river whose streams shall make glad the city of God, the holy place of the tabernacles of the Most High. God is in the midst of her, she shall not be moved; God will help her right early [at the dawn of the morning].

It's interesting to me that tabernacles is plural. There is a sense that we as human beings are now tabernacles in that we carry the light of God in us. In The Message, Eugene Peterson translates "God tabernacled among us" as, God "moved into the neighborhood". So, if we think of ourselves as being a tabernacle wherein we hold the Holy Spirit, well, what does that mean for our neighborhoods? It does make one pause, and calmly think of that!

Fret Not

2010-06-10T16:58:00.000-07:00

How neat to have Psalm 37:1-7 as the verses to read for Day 4 in my Forty Days to a Closer Walk with God journey. I ended my morning devotions with this exact same passage. Truly a conversation with God. The passage starts out with "Fret not", but the verses that speak to me are:

Verse 5: Commit your way to the Lord [roll and repose each care of your load on Him]; trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) also in Him and He will bring it to pass.

Verse 7: Be still and rest in the Lord; wait for Him and patiently lean yourself upon Him; fret not yourself because of him who prospers in his way, because of the man who brings wicked devices to pass.

I love the pictures that the Amplified version of the Bible evoke in my head. Roll and repose each care of your load on Him. I see all my burdens like a heavy stone wheel (you know, like in the BC comic strips) and what strength it takes for me to roll this burden on Jesus. I have to lean into the wheel with all my strength to roll it onto the Lord, then I have to let the "wheel of burdens" repose there. Webster's says that one of the meanings of repose is 'to take a rest'. Whew, I can let out a sign of relief now that my burdens are reposing on the Lord!

And then verse 7 - wait for Him and patiently lean yourself on Him. That just makes me feel so relaxed. I think of how good it feels when you're feeling, lost, alone, or just plain down, and then you have a friend that just gives you a great, gentle, loving hug, or just sits with you and holds your hand. It would be nice sometimes to have a physical presence of Jesus to lean into, but I guess that is what God created people for. To all my friends out there, thank you for all the times you have let me lean on you!

A Sound from Heaven

2010-06-08T17:46:00.000-07:00

Acts 2: 2, 4
And suddenly there came a sound from heaven like the rushing of a violent tempest blast, and it filled the whole house in which they were sitting . . . and they were all filled (diffused throughout their souls) with the Holy Spirit.

When I think of the Holy Spirit, I think most often of comfort. Yet these verses tell me that the Spirit comes to us like a violent tempest blast, a force to be reckoned with. Sometimes when it's storming I think, this is what the Holy Spirit sounded like when it first came. Not some meek gentle breeze, but a roaring wind. I like to imagine that wind blowing through me and just emptying me out of all the useless stuff that I hang on to, cleaning me out, and setting me back on my feet to do the work God's given me (and you) to do, sharing His good news with the world.

I'm so meek about it. I don't want to offend, or be rejected, so I give a meek little testimony and water down the Spirit, taking away it's power. I think of that old children's song: This little light of mine, I'm going to let it shine . . . put it under a bushel - NO!! But, I do put it under a bushel, I limit the power of the Holy Spirit in me by not fulling yielding control of my life to Him.

I think the Holy Spirit is wild and powerful, and life changing. There is a wonderful poem by John Donne (Holy Sonnets: Batter My Heart three person'd God). The following lines capture what I think the Holy Spirit means to do in us:

That I may rise and stand, oer'throw me and bend your force to
break, blow, burn and make me new.

Jeremiah 20:9 also captures the essence of the Holy Spirit that is active in us:

If I say, I will not make mention of [the Lord] or speak any more in His name, in my mind and heart it is as if there were a burning fire shut up in my bones. And I am weary of enduring and holding it in; I cannot [contain it any longer].

Can you imagine the excitement every day would bring if I truly felt like Jeremiah, like holding God's name in was like a burning fire shut up in my bones. Can you imagine the excitement each day would bring if every day I let the powerful Holy Spirit have it's wild and wonderful way with me? Would I be shunned for my fire? Would I care?

And Some Doubted

2010-06-06T18:00:00.000-07:00

Day Two of Forty Days to a Closer Walk with God. I read the devotion and settled in for the meditation part. The book suggests that you take the word you use to address God and go no further. You simply address God, quiet yourself, and communicate with Him. I settled in as suggested, sitting up comfortably, closing my eyes to meditate. This is a little challenging for me, to shut off my mind and simply commune with God. I ended up falling asleep, and that would be discouraging, but really, can it be bad to fall asleep with the name of Jesus in your mind?

Matthew 28: 17
And when they saw Him, they fell down and worshiped Him; but some doubted.

The scripture for today was Matthew 28: 16-20. I kept returning to verse 17--I was struck by the fact that some doubted. This is pretty amazing when you think about it. The disciples and others are on the mountaintop, worshiping the resurrected Jesus, and yet, some doubted. I have friends who have said, if I could only just see Jesus, if He would only just talk to me, then I could know, then I could be certain, that He is true and real. But these people in Matthew saw the resurrected Jesus, and yet, some doubted. Isn't this comforting in an odd sort of way? They saw, believed, but still doubted. No doubt these were practical people, or scientific people, whoever they were, they just couldn't believe their eyes. Even for those who saw Jesus, it required faith, just like it requires faith for us today.

I'm not really a person who is plagued by doubt. I like the mystery of Jesus and the gospel. I like that we have a God so big we cannot begin to grasp who He is. I like that mysteriously He is in me, and mysteriously He says that if I am in Him and He is in me, then others may see Him in me too. I think, really? Even when I'm crabby? Even when I'm feeling mean? Even when I'm feeling weak and all alone? Even when I don't feel Him in me?

I hope that people do see Him in me, I pray for that every day, but boy, some days it sure does feel like a stretch!

But You Would Not

2010-06-02T18:02:00.000-07:00

I've started a new book: Forty Days to a Closer Walk with God: The Practice of Contemplative Prayer, which walks you through the process of Lectio Divina. In this practice you read scripture and listen for a word from God. Journaling your thoughts is encouraged, and thus I am recording my thoughts here. The suggested scripture for day one is Isaiah 30:15:

"For thus said the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel: in returning to Me and resting in Me you shall be saved; in quietness and in trusting confidence shall be your strength. But you would not. (Amplified)

Sadly, I think my word from God is: you would not. I read God's promises, I share His promises with others, but deep down, I would not. I would not get my strength from quietness and confidence. I would not rest in God. Even if I get that feeling--you know the one--where you do feel deep down that everything will be all right, I choose not to rest in it. I would not. I'm like the following verses - "I say no - I will speed my own course, I will ride my swift steed doing things my own way". Why do I choose this when I can rest in the Lord God? When quietness and trusting confidence can be my strength? Verse 18 says that "the Lord is a God of justice, and that we are to be envied who expect, look for, and long for Him--His victory, His favor, His love, His peace, His joy, and His matchless unbroken companionship".

My problem is I'm too grounded in this temporal world. I believe this world over and above my heavenly world. I believe this world over and above God. I need to deepen my connection to God. I need to deepen my trust in God. I need to change my would not into I will. I need to rest in God and allow Him to do this work in me.

Inside the Chaos of My Mind

2010-04-03T08:05:00.001-07:00

Lara, this post is for you. You wanted to see my sewing or "project" room, and so, here it is. It is full of ideas and imaginings and it is utter chaos, as you can see above!

This room reflects the creative side of me that never seems to have the energy to express itself anymore. My spirit is numbed and benumbed by ITBS, ELPA, MEAP, and Consolidated Grant. I never wanted to be a numbers person for this very reason. Somehow instead of feeding my energy this type of work depletes my energy and when I get home I just collapse exhausted in my chair and escape into a book. One lovely thing about art is that there are no rules, if someone says you can't do that, you just say "why not", or "yes I can" with no worries about the MDE police cracking down on you!

These little glimmerings of creativeness refuse to die, and so they live on in obscurity in my Project Room. They poke and prod at me wanting and waiting to be expressed in some way. They get birthed, so to speak, and then wait in silence to be given life. Now my room is so full of glimmerings that it is daunting to go in there and work on something. (I have other rooms that could house some of my projects, but I'm a little afraid I will take up every empty room in the house!). Enjoy the tour, but don't judge me on my messiness!

Addendum: It occurs to me that perhaps cleaning my project room should have been on my "Six Impossible Things" list!

Sacred Places

2010-03-29T17:20:00.000-07:00

Bright Shoots Of Everlastingness: Essays On Faith And The American Wild by Paul J. Willis

My rating: 4 of 5 stars
I am not usually an essay reader, but this book captured my interest with the lovely title. I was hooked by the time I was halfway through the introduction. Why exactly did I like it so much? I think I liked the author's honesty and the gentleness in which he presented it. Take for example this thought:

"American evangelicals are no doubt some of the tackiest, corniest, pigheadedest people on earth. However, They are my people, and I am one of them. By historical accident or design, they are the unsavory husk for the kernel of divine love that has been given for me to taste."

What a great picture of Christianity - the ugliness and the beauty lie side by side.

This book felt like a conversation to me. Not a "hurry up" conversation, but a "let's linger together" conversation. A book to help you slow down and contemplate life rather than just rushing through it. Sometimes it made you ponder, and sometimes you just laughed. I felt like the author could be a great friend.

Willis is not only an author, but a mountain climber. He loves the wilderness, he loves reaching the peak. Why? What draws him there? I recently learned that to the Hebrews, to God's people, the mountains are sacred, or thin, places. The people believed that on the mountain the veil separating us from Heaven is thinning out, that they are closer to Heaven on the mountaintop. Is this what the mountaineer feels--that they are closer to God on the mountaintop?

This led me to consider what would my sacred place be, or yours? Is there a place you feel closer to God? Is it by the water, in a meadow, is it a quiet space you've set up at home? Is it the 5 minutes you might spend on your knees in the morning, is it in the difficult situation you are encountering in life, when you cry out to God for help?

I love the water. Something about the lap of the waves, the sound of the beach grass, the way the sun light hovers over the water like a thousand little tinkerbells dancing soothes me and gives comfort. I saw it just yesterday when I took a walk to the channel at Holland State Park. It made me think of Isaiah 61:10:

I delight greatly in the Lord; my soul rejoices in my God. For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.

I think those thousand little tinkerbells dancing on the water would make a lovely robe of righteousness don't you? At least I always imagine that some day when I am clothed with righteousness, I will be illumined by God's lovelight.

It's my favorite time of year, Easter. So much to contemplate as we come up to Maundy Thursday and Resurrection morning. We don't need to climb a mountain to "thin" the veil that separates us from Heaven. The death of Jesus tore the veil, and there is no separation any more. Any place is sacred that we allow Jesus to have full reign over.

So, find a place, it can be anyplace, and let the sacred take you over and rejoice. He is risen!
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Six Impossible Things

2010-03-09T15:19:00.001-08:00

So I'm walking down a hallway, and from the corner of my eyes, I see a stack of books. Hmmm. . . . impossible to pass a stack of books without looking at them. I discover they are all the same book: Firstlight by Sue Monk Kidd. I pick it up, it holds nicely in the hand. I'm excited - I like Sue Monk Kidd. I stop at the office and ask if I can borrow one of the books over the weekend. "Oh, you may have one" the secretary tells me. "Really - to keep?" , "Yes, that's what they're for". Well, it certainly is a good day when you get a free book, and on top of that, discover you really like it! Which leads us to "Six Impossible Things". In one of the little homilies we are reminded that in Alice in Wonderland, the White Queen practiced believing six impossible things before breakfast. Kidd and her daughter decide to give it a try. I'm intrigued. What if I practice six impossible things before breakfast? What would they be? In Firstlight, the daughter wishes for 100 on her science test, and Kidd wishes for completion of two speeches she has to write before tomorrow. Guess what - both their impossible wishes come true. So, here are my six impossible wishes:

To wake up full of energy and good cheer (and with balanced hormones). (Buechner says: Grace is a good night's sleep.)
To create Shalom at work and at home. (Shalom: more than peace, it is where God's will is done--God's purpose is to do everything He can to replace chaos with Shalom)
To slow down and give full attention to the people who "interrupt" my day.
To ask God for guidance before making decisions.
To be patient with whatever comes my way.
To be content with the life God has given me.

Shalom!

2010-02-21T14:14:00.000-08:00

Shalom must surely be one of the most common Hebrew words known around the world! It is pretty much the only Hebrew word I knew when I started an Interactive Hebrew class 2 weeks ago. My good friend Vonnie invited me, and I was eager to attend. The class is taught in a mixture of Hebrew and English. It's fun, informative, and challenging. I am such a reader, I love words, and am finding how much I rely on words to aid me in my learning. To be taught in another language, and pretty much solely by story telling, is to engage my brain in a challenge. I won't come out of the class as a Hebrew linguist, but I will have a new respect for the culture behind the language, the tradition of oral story telling, and the deeper meanings that come from a language other than English. Hebrew language doesn't have as many words as the English language, but the richness of the meanings of the words used adds a depth to their language that is missing from our language, especially in the ways that we write and speak today. When did we lose the richness of our language? I think we need to start a movement to bring it back!

As part of the class we are also reading a book called "Getting Involved With God: Rediscovering the Old Testament" by Ellen F. Davis. We won't be discussing the book (such torture), but it is meant to compliment our learning. We are only supposed to read the chapter assigned to us--whoever heard of such a thing! This is so hard for a person who greedily looks at the books people are reading and wants to snatch and grab them for herself. So, I guess I have to share what I found worth contemplating here. (I did however, notice a book the instructor had on the table called "In Praise of Slowness: Challenging the Cult of Speed" which I rushed right out to buy and am a third of the way through--I tell you, I am not lying when I say I am greedy for books!)

So, our assigned chapter was chapter 5: "Ive Got to Turn Aside: The Burning Bush". The author is making an association between the burning bush and the incarnation. This is what caught my attention:

"Mary, who carried God in her belly and later in her arms, yet did not dissolve to ash--she is herself the bush that burns perpetually, yet is not consumed. That image of Mary, ancient and still fresh, may serve to refresh our reading of Moses' story, which suffers somewhat from over-familiarity. Mary and Moses have this in common: in the history of the world, they are the two people who have known God most intimately, known God in ways that mortal flesh ordinarily could not tolerate without burning to a cinder. The Israelites understood that trespassing on holy ground would bring instant death. The high priest took his life in his hands when he entered the Holy of Holies one day each year, and even he entered the holy place enveloped in smoke, for who could see God and live? Yet God spoke to Moses "face to face, as one speaks to a friend" (Exodus 33:11)--in one place, scripture says "mouth-to-mouth" (Numbers 12:8).

I have never thought of Jesus birth in those terms before. It really is amazing, isn't it. In all the Bible stories before, it's true, the people could not see God, the High Priests had to follow specific rules or die. Yet God placed Jesus in Mary and she lived. It struck me that in a sense we are all like Mary now. God placed the Holy Spirit in us, we carry Him with us through and in everything we say and do. We do not die. We approach Him every day with no consequence other than Love. Even in our disobedience, He loves us. I loved the end of the chapter where the author says:

The flame that burned in the bush at Sinai is the same light to which Mary give birth. It burns yet, and, for all our darkness, is not extinguished. We are in Epiphany, the season of light. Come then, "take your sandals off your feet, for the place where you are standing, it's holy ground".

2010-01-10T15:50:00.000-08:00

Be Still My Soul by Elisabeth Elliot
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

This is the second time I've read this book. Ironically, I pulled it from my shelf looking for "comfort" words, instead of words like:

"God included the hardships of my life in His original plan. Nothing takes Him by surprise. Nothing is for nothing. His plan is to make me holy, and hardship is indispensable for that as long as I live in this hard old world. All I have to do is accept it."

I forgot how practical Elliot is, and true to God's word, and unyielding on the dying to self theme. Do you know how sometimes you're just sick of it, and if someone asks you to do something one more time you just think you'll scream? How sometimes it seems like it would be so nice to have no responsibilities, no none, other than eating cake or sitting on the beach, or anything that only involves the happiness of one person, that person being you? (If you have never been in this place then I think you have the gift of contentment and you are blessed!). Well, that's how I've been feeling lately (not the content part, but the other). So, I looked to Elliot for some good and encouraging words. Oddly, those words didn't provide balm for my soul, but they still did help me. She reminded me that "acceptance of circumstances, the first step in obtaining joy and peace, begins with faith"

I think dying to self has fallen out of favor with the Christian community--it has sure fallen out of favor with me lately! Consider this:

"All the paths of the Lord are lovingkindness and truth to those who keep His covenant and His testimonies [Psalm 25:10 NASB]. About this passage Amy Carmichael once wrote in a note to a coworker, "All does not mean 'all but these paths we are in now' or 'nearly all, but perhaps just not this specially difficult painful one.' All must mean all."

More specific to the dying to self theme:

"As His servants, we lay down our desire for a certain quality of life, our insistence that our life must be arranged in a certain way to order to be acceptable. In a word, we deny ourselves."

So, while I didn't get the balm for my soul I was looking for, God sure told me that I need to get back to work on that dying to self thing. He must have thought I needed a good kick in the pants instead of words of comfort!

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The Babs Bon Mots Book Store

2010-01-07T17:27:00.000-08:00

So, I'm perusing other people's blogs, and I think I need my own bookstore.

If I had my own bookstore I would require that my employees read while working. After all, it is important to model the importance of reading to all people, and everyone knows, when you are shopping for a book, it is usually best to do so without the interference of other people. Naturally employees would lay their book down to assist with purchases (providing they are not at a very exciting part in the book). To aid in their book search, I would employ a computer look up system similar to what we have at the library, making it very easy to see if we have their special book in stock, and exactly where to find it.

I would have a perpetual book club room where you could stop by for wine and chocolate, or mochas and chocolate, or milk and chocolates (there will definately be chocolates) and talk about books with other bibliophiles. (It is possible we could have some healthy snacks, but, that really is debatable.)

Naturally the bookstore will be filled with comfy chairs, and pillows, and maybe even couches.We will stick to the motto of "Snack, Nap, Read" (I think this may need to be made into a quilt). This very important life lesson should begin as soon as a reader is born (if not before)!

Are any of my friends willing to finance this endeavor?

Take This Bread

2010-01-03T17:06:00.000-08:00

Take This Bread: A Radical Conversion by Sara Miles
My rating: 4 of 5 stars
I was intrigued to read this book because of the teaser: "Sara Miles, raised an atheist, wandered into a church, received communion, and found herself transformed--embracing a faith she'd once scorned". Coincidentally, I had just heard a sermon about how the Table is for everyone (see November post). Also, about 6 months ago, I incorporated John 6:57 into my daily prayers: "Just as the living Father sent me and I live by [through, because of:] the Father, even so whoever continues to feed on me [whoever takes me for His food and is nourished by me:] shall [in his turn:] live through and because of me." Amplified Bible. So . . . I was very interested to read this story of a woman who was transformed and nourished, even when she didn't know one thing about what coming to the table meant.

This book will be challenging for you if you have pre-conceived notions about the gay community, bad language, and sexual promiscuity--in other words, if you were brought up in traditional church in West Michigan. Sara Miles is very open about her sexual relationships and her life as an openly gay woman. However, she is also a woman who loves God, and falls deeper and deeper into love with him. She asks good questions of herself, and of us. It reminded me a little bit of an out of print book I read years ago: "What Happens if I Say Damn You God" by Charles Victor Arokiasamy. God is able to handle and answer so many more of our questions than we give Him credit for. But, to get back to Sara's story - she took her experience and made something real and good out of it. She took that nourishment and challenged herself and others to extend nourishment to others in real food for real people in real struggles. She accepts people for who they are, builds relationships with them, and spreads God's love to them. This is what we are called to do, and, for me, this book was a powerful reminder of that.
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Stories are my favorite things

2009-12-28T09:23:00.000-08:00

Tell Me a Story: The Life-Shaping Power of Our Stories by Daniel Taylor
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I will let the author speak for me:

"Stories tell me not only who I am but also who you are, and what we are together. In fact, without you and your story I cannot know myself and my story. no one's story exists alone. Each is tangled up in countless others. Pull a thread in my story and feel the tremor half a world and two millennia away."

"It is crucial . . . that we surround children, and ourselves, with healthy stories. These stories should be filled with mentors, models, and heroes who do the kinds of things, physically and spiritually, that we ourselves wish to do. If I cannot imagine myself doing something, I am unlikely even to attempt it. Stories multiply our possibilities."

"Stories can . . . literally give us courage. The child who hears of another child outwitting a giant in a fairy tale is better equipped to conquer the equally fearsome giants in his or her own life. . . this is one of many reasons to reject the flippant response "It's just a story" . . . Stories are more real and more determinative in our lives than the vast majority of things that go on in the merely physical world. Stories form our minds and spirits, the way we perceive ourselves and others, and how we act in the world. Strip the world of story and it becomes more a simple mechanism--and therefore less real."

"Storytellers should be aware that they are dealing with dangerous materials. Life and death flow to us through stories. Words have almost unlimited power to destroy and to heal. Nothing is more false than the implication of the phrase 'words, words, words--nothing but words.' More lives have been destroyed by words than by bullets, and more lives redeemed and made whole."

"In his Nobel Lecture, Solzhenitsyn reflects on the role of stories, and art generally, in the modern world, and identifies four things literature can do to help heal a violent, fragmented, alienated world. First, it preserves memory, without which we forget who we are. In addition, it helps us to see ourselves accurately, diluting our human tendency to self-delusion. Further, it gives us a vehicle for overcoming our radical separateness and the relativism of values, offering something for common contemplation that shows us our potential for agreement and community. Lastly, as we have seen, art and stories can vanquish lies, including the lies that provide the needed cover for violence and oppression."

Tonia, you have it right when you say, "Fight Evil, Read Books".

I really liked this book, and when I think of my life as story, and my friends as characters in my book, I don't know, it just adds something to my life.
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Coming to the Table

2009-11-22T16:24:00.000-08:00

We had the nicest sermon on taking communion a few Sundays ago. The scripture was from 1 Corinthians 11:17-34. For me, it was a beautiful reminder that you and I are always welcome at the Lord's table.

It is only when we come to supper with the Lord that we can receive His Power and His Grace. It is here we can be washed clean and rest in God's presence. The blessing is that we can come just as we are. . . no, you do not need to be perfect and without sin - an impossibility that it seems I, at least, am ever striving to attain. I think that I am often tempted to judge myself and other people, as to whether they are worthy to partake. I'm not sure if this is something that I grew up with in the Church, or something that I picked up from the world, but the thing is - I don't get to decide. The Lord has invited everyone to come to the table. Everyone means just that, everyone - the blatent sinner, the unbeliever, you, and me. Some of the sermon highlights:

When we prohibit people from coming to the Lord's table they cannot receive the power of Jesus. When we come to the Table of the Lord we let Jesus show Himself to us.
While there, we need to enjoy the feast for all it's worth.
Unusual prayer is fitting at the Lord's table.This is the place to bring your most outrageous and impossible requests.
Jesus can flow His wholeness into any part of my life (or yours) that is broken. It is here that we receive God's cleansing.

Isn't this all such a mystery and such a great picture of how outrageous and upside down it is to be a Christian. We can't reflect God's glory if we are not nourished by His body and blood. We must turn the other cheek and forgive seventy times seven, we must go and tell this strange and unbelievable message to people that don't know Him. We must follow His creed of loving our neighbor as ourselves. Not just the neighbor that we find it easy to like, but also the neighbor that we find reprehensible and unlikeable. Who else follows a religion like this?

I'm reading an interesting book: Take This Bread by Sara Miles. Sara's ancestors were Christians on both her mother and father's sides. Her mom and dad however, rejected the faith. Sara had no interest in the Christian lifestyle. Until . . . one day for reasons unknown to her she stopped by a church and took communion. She knew nothing about God, she just sort of followed the routine of the people in the church, but taking the bread and wine changed her. I'm still learning about her journey, but am struck by her stories of the people in the church who we might turn out, and who are actually the sort of people that Jesus hung out with. I'm struck anew by the fact that it's not my job to judge, but rather to love. How to love without judging? How to speak to the wrong without alienating the wrongdoer, and is that even my role? Do we only point the way to Love and leave the rest to the Holy Spirit?

These are the sorts of questions rolling around in my brain. I'm thankful that I can be nourished by God's body every day, and that His Holy Spirit is accessible to me every day, not just at communion. I'm thankful that I'm not the Judge, and that, even though I don't know the answers to my questions, that I can count on the One who knows all the answers to lead me down the right paths as long as I entrust myself to Him.

2009-11-10T07:42:00.000-08:00

If you are a Christian, and love Jesus, then you know He's called us to be the light of the world. I've been thinking about this a lot lately, partly because we're focusing on World Missions in Church, and partly because that's always a part of my thought process in my life as a Christian. Since we've been focusing on World Missions, we're seeing and learning a lot about the amazing work God is doing in countries where they don't have the gospel, or not allowed to share the gospel. Learning about people who are putting their lives on the line so that others can hear and share in the Good News.

This always makes me feel a little inadequate--I haven't gone to Africa, or India, or anywhere really, except to my desk at work every day. I believe that God uses me where I am, but somehow it doesn't seem like it measures up to the Great Commission. I'm trying to think differently about it, because I know God uses me, and I know I have some things He's wanting me to do right where I am that I'm really not too crazy about doing. Heart things that could make a difference in how hearts view Him. Do you think it counts if you do the heart things, but don't FEEL the heart things? (This is really a rhetorical question, I know the answer is YES, but wouldn't it be better and more honoring if my heart could do those things joyfully rather than reluctantly and with much groaning?)

If you haven't seen the "A Thousand Questions" video by Willow Creek you should take 10 minutes to view it. I think the ending in particular, clearly shows that we are called to help in the world, certainly, but also, the world isn't just far away places, but it's right here, right now, right where you are. There are school kids that need our help, people in nursing homes, homeless people right here in our own backyards, and yes the people we work and live with every day.

Perhaps some day I will go to a persecuted country and share the good news. Perhaps not. Maybe I'll always be sharing the good news in my own small way in my own small corner of Holland, Michigan. For me, the greater victory will be when "I will [not merely walk, but] run the way of Your commandments, when You give me a heart that is willing" Psalm 119:32 Amplified

In the meantime, I will remember the words of William Booth, and show God's mercy where I am.

"Not called" did you say? "Not heard the call" I think you should say. Put your ear down to the Bible, and hear Him bid you go and pull sinners out of the fire of sin. Put your ear down to the burdened, agonized heart of humanity and listen to its pitiful wail for help. Go stand by the gates of hell and hear the damned entreat you to go to their father's house and bid their brothers and sisters not to come there. Then look Christ in the face--whose mercy you have professed to obey--and tell Him whether you will join heart and soul and body and circumstances in the march to publish His mercy to the World. (my italics)

"Crispin": Junior Fiction Worth Reading

2009-11-08T15:53:00.000-08:00

Crispin: The Cross of Lead by Avi

My rating: 4 of 5 stars
Crispin is set in the 14th century. It's the story of a boy who is known only as Asta's son, and discovers his true name after a series of sometimes cruel and sometimes strange events. He is pursued on every side for reasons that are not clear to him. In all his 13 years he has never been treated with kindness, but only with contempt or dismissal. In the beginning the language seemed a little stilted to me, and some of it put me off, in that 14th century language isn't that smooth I guess. Before long though, I was wondering what misadventure was going to happen next, and how the story would be resolved. I strove mightily not to read the end before finishing the book, but alas, I can rarely resist that temptation. It never ruins the story for me though, and I just picked up where I left off and read through to the end. I'm thinking this has something to do with my impatient nature, which is sometimes an advantage, and sometimes not. One thing that struck me was the picture of people as souls. Rather than saying "150 people can fill this building" the book would say "150 souls can fill this building. I like that. I think we should have kept that language, because when I think of you as a soul, I value you so much more.
Crispin: At the Edge of the World by Avi

My rating: 4 of 5 stars
The day after I finished Crispin: The Cross of Lead I went to the library to get this book. I wanted to know what was going to happen! I enjoyed this book as much as the first. Crispin has grown in his sense of daring and right and wrong. His loyalty to his friend Bear is strong. His curiosity though, seems to get him into a little bit of trouble. I'm disappointed that the 3rd part of this trilogy is not out yet. Now I'm left hanging until it's published!

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Have You Read "The Help" Yet?

2009-11-01T16:26:00.000-08:00

The Help by Kathryn Stockett
My rating: 4 of 5 stars
It's 1962 in Mississipi, and a majority of white women have a black maid to help them at home. They trust this maid to comfort and feed their children, make their meals, do their ironing, but they don't want them to use their bathrooms. This is just a tiny example of the many little prejudices that black people in the South have learned to put up with. White people may treat their maids as family, or they may treat them as non-persons. Someone who treats them as fully human, may themselves face repercussions from their community.

The Help really brought home to me how dysfunctional this society was. The children would treat the black women that cared for them as if they were their mothers. They would play with white children, and love them. Until, that is, they reach a certain stage. I have no concept of what it meant to be black in that society, or in this society now. I think white people in general have no idea of the small or large inconveniences that are purposefully put on black people. We have no idea of the very real courage they had to have to fight their way to freedom, and that so many of them did that with dignity and grace deserves our applause.

The story is told in 3 unique voices: Aibileen, Minny, and Miss Skeeter, who is white. Each character is unique, and each character struggles with who they can become, and taking the courage necessary to become that woman.

The author, Kathryn Stockett, had a black maid in her childhood, so the story has authenticity. The book jacket tells us:

Seemingly as different from one another as can be, these women will nonetheless come together for a clandestine project that will put them all at risk. And why? Because they are suffocating within the lines that define their town and thir times. And sometimes lines are made to be crossed.

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If You Like Old Literature Try This

2009-11-01T16:12:00.001-08:00

The Painted Veil by W. Somerset Maugham
My rating: 3 of 5 stars
This book was copyrighted in 1925, and it's actually sort of between 3 and 4 stars. I was intrigued to read it when I saw clips for the film version of it. It's about a woman who married a man she didn't love, and is foolishly in love with a married man. Her husband discovers this love affair, and gives her an ultimatum - either file for divorce and name your lover, or come with me to Mei-tan-fu, which is ridden with cholera. Her lover doesn't want to marry her, as her husband well knew, and so she goes to Mei-tan-fu. I was expecting her to fall in love with Charlie (her husband), while there, but she does not. Eventually she finds a purpose in helping with the children, and a sort of satisfaction in the woman she becomes. I can't give away anymore without spoiling the story. To understand the story as a whole, you will need to look up "Elegy" by Goldsmith, unless you are already familiar with it.

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Am I Living a Life of Adventure?

2009-10-28T16:25:00.000-07:00

The Crime Of Living Cautiously: Hearing God's Call To Adventure by Luci Shaw

My rating: 4 of 5 stars
I read this book because I feel like I DO live my life cautiously, and wanted to see what Luci Shaw had to say. It didn't hurt that she is one of the featured speakers at Festival of Faith and Writing at Calvin College this year. I liked how each chapter began with a quote and ended with reflective questions. In Chapter 7 (The Risky Adventure of the Unknown) she quotes poet Mary Oliver: "Listen, are you breathing just a little, and calling it a life?" Doesn't that just give you pause? Is this what I'm doing, cheating God of a life fully surrendered to Him because I'm a chicken? This paragraph ends with this thought:

"We need God to confound us with a mission larger than we are, so that we can call on Him for what we need and don't have."

I liked that. I need to listen more for God's call to adventure and listen to Him. I loved the ending thought from the last chapter:

"The cliff edge of our anxiety about the future may indicate that God is calling us to a new and different level of faith. When we walk, praying for guidance, to the edge of all the light we have and breathlessly take that first step into the foggy mystery of the unknown, we must believe that one of two things will happen: either God will provide us with something rock-solid to land on and stand on, or He will teach us how to fly."

Here's to flying!

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The White House and Capitol Buildings

2009-10-24T17:25:00.000-07:00

Do you know that verse in the Bible where it says that God has prepared good deeds for us to perform ahead of time? I felt like I was the recipient of those good deeds on Wednesday when the car died on me. Ron was in the condo napping with his phone turned off, and I was stranded in the parking lot of Big Giant. I walked over to Auto Advantage and they lugged their battery tester over to Big Giant and tested the battery – which was good, but low on charge. Then they lugged over a battery to charge it up but that didn’t do anything. The gentleman that was helping thought it was the starter – so now what!!? I asked if he knew of a place that did good work but was reasonable and he immediately dialed Woody at Don’s Sunoco. They towed the car over (dropping me off at the condo on the way) and told me it would be done by the morning for sure, pretty iffy for getting done that afternoon. I called Rep. Hoekstra’s office where they graciously changed our tour to Thursday. Probably no more than an hour later Don’s called and they had the car done! They drove over to the condo to drop off the car and we drove Woody back to Don’s. Everything worked out so nicely. We had decided to just be lazy so I read “The Help” (very good), Ron napped, and then we went to dinner at Brio’s in Tyson’s corner (one of the 11 largest malls in US). Very good food and service, and I totally enjoyed my Crème Brulee Trio and Ron enjoyed one of the biggest pieces of chocolate cake ever!

Thursday morning we headed out to Old Ebbitt Grill in downtown DC. Ebbitt’s has been there 100+ years, and we thoroughly enjoyed our breakfasts (Egg Strata and Frittata) and yes, then we fell for dessert at breakfast (pecan pie a la mode and Chocolate Brownie Cappucino which was HUGE). Ebbitt’s is a beautiful old building and I thank my sister and Daniela from Pete Hoekstra’s office for recommending it.

After breakfast we headed out to the White House. First we stopped at the Visitor’s Center, which was okay, but I think we both felt we could have skipped it. Then we joined the other tourists to view the South view (Rose Garden and where Air Force One lands). Of course, we are barred out. I bet when Washington lived there you could have walked right up and knocked on the door. It doesn’t seem right to me that the House we help pay for doesn’t allow you in. We walked around and viewed the front as well. There were a few protester’s, but mostly just us tourists. From the White House we metro’d to the Rayborn Building to pick up our Capitol tour tickets from Pete Hoekstra’s Office. While I was removing my belt (I was tired of removing this by the end of the day, but it kept setting off the alarm), I noticed a sign for DIBELS pointing to the left. Somehow I had not expected to run into that while in DC – no protesters that I could see though.

The capitol tour was interesting. Our guide was very knowledgeable and took us through the history of the paintings and statues. Our government sure likes to spend a lot of money on these buildings and statues. We’re talking big bucks with marble floors, bronze statues, chandeliers, etc. Given this economy and the trouble our country is in I have to wonder about the wisdom of it. The Library of Congress was in the millions of dollars and they built that during the depression. It seems like the dollars we spend on these buildings could be better invested in people. I love seeing them, and seeing the history of the country, but I wonder if these monuments are just to make us feel important and show our success to other people/countries. Maybe we need to be more humble and frugal, and use these dollars to build up people instead of monuments.

After touring the capitol we sat in the House Gallery for a while. They were voting while we were there. It was driving Ron crazy because it just looked so chaotic and disorganized down there. Everyone was chatting people up in between the votes, and when the chairman would say what they were voting for and how long they would vote people just kept talking. Ron thought it was disrespectful, and he was disappointed we didn’t get to see a debate. After the house we went over to the Senate side. Hmmm. . . no-one was there. Eventually a few of the Senator’s walked in. This was actually fun for me because there were some young people (high school, college freshman?) there. When the Senator’s walked in they got so excited. Look! Is that Joe Biden?! (It wasn’t) We did get to see Joe Lieberman, John McCain, John Kerry, Debbie Stabenaw, Carl Levin and others. The kids were a riot. Ron hated to leave because it seemed like things were going to start happening, but we were meeting our niece for dinner so we had to go.

We enjoyed delicious pizza at Matchbox Pizza (Capitol Hill location) – Chicken Pesto and Sausage with sun dried tomatoes, and molten cake for dessert. We do love our desserts! Then off to view the monuments at night which was very nice.

We’re on our way home right now (I’m typing this in the car). We’ve decided you have to spend like a month in DC to see everything. I didn’t even get into any art museums and I had hoped to see some original Whistler’s art. Didn’t get to view the Smithsonian Castle, Spy Museum. I guess we’ll have to come back some day!

Library of Congress and Arlington

2009-10-20T17:05:00.000-07:00

Today we toured the Library of Congress and visited Arlington National Cemetary. The Library of Congress is an absolutely beautiful building. The government spent millions of dollars on it. I'm not sure what I think of that. All these memorials and buildings, built with millions of dollars . . . seems like perhaps it would have been more beneficial to us as a nation to have those dollars invested in people. Libraries are important though - I myself couldn't live without one. There is a quote from Jefferson saying "I could not live without books", and I must say I can relate to that. It is ironic that we started the tour with a very nice video that stressed over and over again that this was OUR library, and then we couldn't even go in the reading room, which was a deep disappointment to me. Evidently over the years, those that were using the room for research were disturbed by the presence of the tours. However, times are achanging, and now most people get their research from the Library via the internet. There were only 2 people in there while we were touring so I think they need to change the rule! You can go in if you get a pass, which takes about 15 minutes, but you have to be prepared to say what you will research. Once inside you get assigned to a table and then your research is brought to you. I just wanted to sit in there for maybe 5 minutes and absorb the ambiance. I mean, you couldn't even take pictures and had to view the room through a glass enclosure!

Arlington Cemetary and the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier

Arlington Cemetery is so vast. You know going in that it is big, but it's hard to comprehend the size of it once you're there. It is a beautiful and peaceful place. The birds that hang out there have a beautiful song. So many lives sacrificed. One thing I didn't know was that wives can be buried with their husbands at Arlington. I don't know if I would want my son or daughter buried there. I know they would be in heaven, but I think I would want to be able to visit the gravesite. We had beautiful weather for our visit, sunny and high 60s or low 70s. We also visited the Robert E. Lee memorial which is on the hill above the cemetery. He is the only person who fought against the United States for whom a memorial has been given. The house (memorial) actually belonged to Curtis Washington and was captured during the war by Lee and his soldiers.

We shared the viewing of the changing of the guard with veterans from World War II. They all wore caps saying John Hancock Memorial Flight. Their hats had pins on them with a picture of Elizabeth Dole's brother. One of the volunteers traveling with them told us that Elizabeth sponsored the trip. Their presence made the changing of the guard more meaningful for us.

The Monuments of Washington DC

2009-10-19T17:04:00.000-07:00

Well, we began our day by figuring out the Metro system with the help of the very nice station attendants. I tell you what, I really felt like a country bumpkin. When you live in a small town, even the metro is an adventure. We now have our smart pass, and one day under our belt, so perhaps we'll become more cosmopolitan - who knows! The weather was sunny and clear for our first day in the city. The wind, however, was quite cold. Fortunately it became more tolerable after noon.

Upon exiting the metro the first thing we saw was the Washington Monument. It really is an elegant piece of architecture. This is a great time to be here because we didn't have a crowd of people. We walked right up to get tickets for the ride without waiting in line, although we did have to come back at 1:30 for the ride to the top. It was nice to just meander around the monument without being jostled or feeling like you keeping other people from getting their chance to enjoy the view.

We then went to the World War II memorial. It is also so striking. When you think of the men and women who gave their lives it gives you pause. War is a terrible thing, but having gone from the memorials of our founding fathers to the Holocaust Memorial in the afternoon . . . let's just say it is difficult to comprehend such evil, and we can be thankful for the men and women who fought against it.

The Lincoln Memorial was next. What a time in our history that was. Family members fighting against each other. Each side thinking they were in the right. Having such passion about a circumstance or a cause to turn you against the people you love--how can I understand that? I always wonder if Lincoln was a lonely man, I think I would be if I was him. I would be agonizing about my decisions, and wondering who I could really trust and count on to be my friend. Yet he stayed to the course that he considered right and true. He was a true man of integrity.

Korean War Memorial next. I was struck here especially by how quiet and respectful people were in this area. I really felt like people were treating it like a sacred place. The way the statues are positioned, half in the shadows, half in the sun, made me feel the tentativeness the soliders might have felt as they walked through the war zone.

Vietnam Wall. What a long wall, and ever so many names. I was brought to tears by a woman and man taking a rubbing of the name of someone they loved from the wall. This is all they have left - a name on a wall. I don't think I can understand the depth of their sorrow and regret.

Holocaust Museum. This is out of the depth of my understanding. How did this little man, who I think looked just like a crazy man while he talked, rise to such power? How did people, who I'm sure must have been people just like you and me, become messengers of evil? It should scare us half to death, because that same capacity for evil is in you and me. The same self-preservation that made them turn their eyes away is in us. Don't we just need good people in the world? People of integrity and who want to shine the light on the darkness. We need to do what is right from the smallest things to the biggest things. I was amazed at the end, first of all at the survival of the human body - skeletons were walking clothed with the most minimum amount of human skin. Second, one of the films showed all these really healthy looking children walking out of a camp, and I couldn't understand it. These were the twins that were used for experimentation. Healthy bodies, but who knows how their spirits were crushed. But then third, that there were rescuers! Brave men and women who did what they could to save the jews, some dying for their efforts. But it just lifted my spirits to see these good people, and I hope that I would have been one of them.

2009-10-18T16:40:00.000-07:00

We arrived at our condo in Falls Church,VA today. This is the 3rd time we have have used Vacation Rental by Owner. We've been pretty pleased with the results. We're paying $100 a night, plus a cleaning fee, and have all the amenities, including a washer and dryer in our unit. We can catch a bus to the metro just around the corner, or drive to the metro station within 5 minutes - we are very close to DC. I'm looking forward to getting into the city tomorrow and viewing the monuments. This will be even more fun since I just finished "The Lost Symbol" by Dan Brown, and will hopefully be able to separate fact from fiction! I am not a huge Dan Brown fan, but really liked this book. His theology leaves a little to be desired, but I cannot write anymore without spoiling your reading pleasure!

The Risk of Relinquishment

2009-10-08T18:05:00.000-07:00

It's a good title isn't it? I wish I could take credit for it, but, the credit goes to Luci Shaw, the author of The Crime of Living Cautiously: Hearing God's Call to Adventure. Relinquishment is the theme of a chapter of the book. It's been rolling around in my head for a while, due to this excerpt:

Emptying the Vessel:

I have learned from New Testament Greek studies that "to empty oneself," as used in this passage, has the sense not merely of a vessel being poured out but of a waterfall that continually spills itself over a cliff edge. Jesus continues to pour himself out for us in love, day by day. His once-in-a-lifetime act of dying for us, a historical event, is being reenacted in a different form, in an ongoing relationship of giving and loving.

When I first read this I just felt tired. I don't think I am alone in feeling like all I do is pour myself out for others every day. Don't think I don't know how whiney and selfish that sounds. However, I think that women, especially, are always pouring themselves out for friends, family and coworkers in all sorts of ways. It just gets tiring sometimes, doesn't it? To think of pouring yourself out like a waterfall, well, that's just plain exhausting. And, excuse me, when is it my turn to be poured out for? (I am most tempted to take out this whole paragraph because in print it sounds even more whiney and selfish!)

This passage has stuck with me, and as I've been reflecting on it, the picture it makes has become more and more beautiful to me. Picture a waterfall in your mind. It doesn't matter whether it's a big or small one, the principal is the same. Whether it's a forceful flow, or a steady drip, the waterfall influences the ground on which it lands. It takes a landscape, and turns it into something else. It breaks down stone, it washes away dirt, it makes a curve where it was straight, or a drop where it was level. These changes don't happen instantly, but over time, the waterfall keeps up it's persistent presence. Even the sound of a waterfall is always there, whether it's a roar, or a plop, plop, plop--it's constant.

Now picture love as that waterfall. You have to stop and really think about this--what happens when you choose love, constantly. When you choose to serve when you feel like being selfish, when you choose to love even when you're feeling angry, when you choose to love, even when you don't feel love. Love has the same power as a waterfall. Love makes a hard heart soft, love makes the unwelcome feel welcome, love restores what was broken, love sets free what was bound. Like the waterfall, persistent love has the power to change a person, a circumstance, a heart. God's love in us, (which is thankfully powered by the Holy Spirit) makes us like the waterfall. It's impossible for me to express constant love without Him.

You know, I make so many mistakes every day. I don't choose not to show love, but something ugly just pops out of me. It comforts me to know that even though that happens, I can still go back and choose love. I can say, I'm so sorry, that's not how I want to be. It's encouraging to know that over time, love will still do it's work.

My son had a sign on his computer for the longest time: Love Wins. I like that. Love Wins.

What Does Your Face Say?

2009-09-26T07:34:00.000-07:00

If you are a fan of Jeff Berryman's book "Leaving Ruin", you will know why I like his blog. I recommend you read his entry on "The Yes Face".

Gives one pause - it's a face I'd like to have more often!

It's Still Summer in Michigan

2009-09-19T16:21:00.000-07:00

It may say September on the calendar, but today is too lovely to be called fall. I am so lucky to be able to walk to the state park from my house, and I always enjoy it so on days like these when families take advantage of the summery weather. Today I saw a man painting in long white pants, short sleeve shirt and a straw hat with an easel set up by Lake Mac. He could have been a scene in a book, or a painting from long ago times. Another curious thing I saw was a little dog being "walked" in a stroller. I have to say this seems a bit cruel and unusual for a dog who looked to be perfectly healthy. Don't folks know dogs like to run about? But the best part is coming up to the channel just prior to entering the beach area. I love the little toddlers with their diapered bubble butts poking out of their shorts, and their little bare chests and toes as they run through the sand. This one was following a "doggie, doggie, doggie", all the while pointing at the doggie and running as best he could in the sand. I love seeing the families with the little towheads eating their hot dogs and drinking their pop at the picnic tables along the channel (we do live in Holland, so they really are mostly tow-heads). Lovers of all ages, newly in love couples strolling with their blankets and picnic supplies to watch the sunset, grandmothers and grandfathers sitting on their chairs either with their children and grandchildren, or without. Middle age couples reading in their camp chairs or grilling with friends. There is a relaxed ambiance about it all that is charming to me. Some nights when I walk, the older folks are sitting in their chairs and listening to the Tigers on the radio, enjoying the last days of the beach and baseball.

Fishermen/women of all ages are out as well. Some walking with their poles to the end of the pier, some along the channel, and one lucky fellow caught a big one while chugging through the channel to the big lake. There were cheers all around for him. In these lazy summer days everyone is warmly welcoming to those that cross their paths.

Sailboats on the lake, people on ski-doos, and a few die hard families still sitting on shore with their blankets and umbrellas, determined to soak it all in before fall blows in.

I enjoyed some time on a lookout just soaking in the sun, listening to my music, and thinking how serene it all is. It seems surreal that I get to enjoy this, and that others in the world are enduring war, poverty, illness and death. I need to be a lot more grateful for what I have.

When I turned to leave, I heard the wind rustling in the Aspens, and discovered, they not only sound like rain, but also an awful lot like when we turn the pages of our sermon taking notes in church! I passed a couple that had been reading and restrained myself from accosting a perfect stranger to see if he liked The Shack. As I sat on a boulder and emptied the sand from my sandals, the sun glinted off the beach grass and it looked for all the world like the grass that we put in Easter baskets.

It won't be long and this beach scene will change. The clouds will be dark and low, and the sun will turn the cloud edges shades of gold. The leaves will be golden as well, and will gently float to the ground. A friend once told me about a poem with these lines "Margaret are you grieving over golden grove unleaving" (Gerard Manley Hopkins) I always think of this poem in the fall. But for now, it is still summer in Michigan :-)

Leelanau and Andrew Peterson

2009-09-14T17:35:00.001-07:00

So, what do Leelanau and Andrew Peterson have in common? Nothing really, I just happened to hear some of his songs while we were driving home, which led to me looking them up on itunes and downloading an entire album, something I don't usually do!

First, Leelanau - we had a great weekend. I read Jodi Picoult's book Handle with Care (see previous post), relaxed in the sun, ate at Boone's, Freshwater Lodge, and had ice cream with the cows. Have you been to Moomer's? Good Morning America voted it as having the "best" ice cream, I just for some strange reason like going and eating my ice cream while watching the cows. Boone's, of course, is always good, and they have some affiliates in Grand Rapids and Muskegon. If you have eaten at any of these places, let me know how they were: The Omelette Shoppe, Bagel Beanery, Sundance Grill, Bear Lake Tavern, and Alleyway Bar and Grill. Ron and I are always up for a good meal! Freshwater Lodge is in Traverse City, there are lots of dead fish and other animals hanging up if you like that sort of thing :-).

Now, for Andrew Peterson. I heard his "All Things New" on the way home, and immediately looked it up in itunes. I listened to the little clip you get with each song and decided I needed them all. If you don't know Andrew Peterson, he's kind of folksy, guitary, mellow singer. I love so many of the words in the songs - in All Things New:

"Come broken and weary, come battered and bruised, my Jesus makes all things new.

In All You'll Ever Need:

"The blood of Jesus, it is like the widow’s oil: it’s enough to pay the price to set you free. It can fill up every jar and every heart that ever beat. When it’s all you have it’s all you’ll ever need."

From Love is a Good Thing

"Love is a good thing. It’ll follow you down to the ruin of your great divide, and open the wounds that you tried to hide. And there in the rubble of the heart that died you’ll find a good thing. Love is a good thing."

My favorite from the Album is The Good Confession: I Believe

"All I know is that I was blind but now I see that though I kick and scream, Love is leading me. And every step of the way his grace is making me; with every breath I breathe, he is saving me. And I believe. So when my body’s weak and the day is long, when I feel my faith is all but gone, I’ll remember when I sing this song that I believe. I believe he is the Christ, Son of the living God, my Lord, my Savior."

(Tonia, when I hear this song I just feel joy and think of your daughter dancing!)

I also discovered I liked his Lay Me Down from the Far Country Album:

I’ll open up my eyes on the skies I’ve never known
In the place where I belong
And I’ll realize His love is just another word for Home

I believe in the holy shores of uncreated light
I believe there is power in the blood
And all of the death that ever was,
If you set it next to life
I believe it would barely fill a cup
‘Cause I believe there’s power in the blood

When you lay me down to die
So long, boys, so long, girls
Lay me down and let me say goodbye to this world
You can lay me anywhere
But just remember this
When you lay me down to die
You lay me down to live

The words are even better with the music. The only song I ever knew from him before was some goofy song about cartoons. I think he may become a new favorite.

"Handle With Care" by Jodi Picoult

2009-09-14T15:20:00.001-07:00

Handle with Care by Jodi Picoult

My rating: 4 of 5 stars
Disturbing but good, thought provoking like most of Picoult's books. I loved how she took recipes and used that terminology to relate to life. For example:

"Tempering: to heat slowly and gradually. Most of the time when we talk about a temper, we mean a qwuickness to anger. In cooking, though, tempering is about making something stronger by taking your time. You temper eggs by adding a hot liquid in small increments. The idea is to raise their temperature without causing them to curdle. The result is a stirred custard that can be used as a dessert sauce or incorporated into a complex dessert. Here's something interesting: the consistency of the finished product has nothing to do with the type of liquid used to heat it. The more eggs you use, the thicker and richer the final product will be. Or in other words, it's the substance you've got when you start that determines the outcome."

I like also how she wordsmithed the first chapter -

"Things break all the time. Glass, and dishes, and fingernails. Cars and contracts and potato chips. You can break a record, a horse, a dollar. You can break the ice. There are coffee breaks and lunch breaks and prison breaks. Day breaks, waves break, voices break. Chains can be broken. So can silence, and fever."I don't believe I've ever thought of the word breaks in all those different waves.

I've told you a little about the book without really telling you anything. It is a story about choices, and how those choices affect our lives and the lives of others. About priorities, and are yours and mine in the right places. If you read it, call me up so we can talk about it!

View all my reviews >>

While Away Your Day with a Book

2009-09-06T18:11:00.000-07:00

The House at Riverton by Kate Morton

My rating: 4 of 5 stars
This book captured and kept my interest, and was a great way to while away a Saturday and Sunday. A fascinating story from the past is being made into a film, an elderly lady who was on the periphery of the story is still alive, and knows the secret behind the story. The book weaves back and forth between her memories and her present life. I feel like this book was more a tale than a story. Webster's says a tale is: a report of a private or confidential matter; a usually imaginative narrative of an event. That's what this book felt like to me.

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A Walk on the Beach

2009-09-01T18:16:00.000-07:00

I meandered to the beach tonight. It was such beautiful weather, and who knows how long it will last. My plan was to sit on the swing and watch the sunset, but the swing was too tight, and my legs were too long, so it wasn't very comfortable. Instead, I perched on a picnic table on a small hill by the side of the channel. I was surrounded by a stand of Aspens. As the light breeze blew through the Aspens you heard a sound like a light rain on your rooftop. It was so relaxing. The sun was low in the sky and it looked so pretty through a screen of beach grass. I would have liked to have placed my bed there for the night, it was such a perfect setting. There were no clouds, so the sunset was basically a line of pink above the water, but soon, when real Fall hits, and the clouds are hanging low in the sky they will be lit with shades of gold. One of my favorite times of year. So funny, watched the sunset, and walked home with the moon which was shining very brightly from the sun's light. About halfway home I started to hear the tree toads. I love the sound of tree toads, which is kind of weird cuz some of them sound like squeaky tennis shoes on the gym floor, and some of them sound like two sticks rubbing or tapping together. Here and there you would hear the techy sound of a cricket, and sometimes the chirping that a cricket makes. Throw in the sound of a dog barking here and there and it sounded suspiciously like music!

Leadership Summit Reflections #2

2009-08-18T14:58:00.000-07:00

I forgot to mention two other ponderings I've been having. In the round table discussion, probably my least favorite session, (Bill Hybels, Henry Cloud, Patrick Lencioni, David Ireland and Carly Fiorina [I do love her]), were talking about the hiring process, and the importance of getting it right. One thought they put out there was that we don't take the time we should take when hiring people. We're often in a hurry to fill the position, and so don't dig deeper, looking not just at education, but competency and story--what is the story of the person you're hiring. Sometimes story can tell you more than resumes can. Because we don't dig deeper, we sometimes hire the wrong person, but, rather than admit that, and rather than hold accountability (using clarity and care), our brains make the person hired into the person we want them to be. This has been rolling around in my head for a while for several reasons - 1) I think it is true, I think organizations everywhere do that, and 2) isn't this what we do with relationships? We make the person we're with into the person we want them to be rather than accepting and loving them for who they are, or, in the case of a bad relationship, getting out. . . and, do we talk to those people with clarity and care so that they can understand us and we can understand them?

Then, how could I forget Jessica Jackley, the co-founder of Kiva.org? I've written about Kiva in this blog before - the world's first peer to peer online microlending website. For as little as $25 you can sponsor an entrepreneur in a third world country, or, even here in the US. Jessica and her team have created an elegant mission statement for Kiva: to connect people through lending for the sake of alleviating poverty. She's done everything right with the mission statement, short, sweet, easy to remember, and it is the heart of what they do. I am most impressed with their integrity. She shared that organizations have offered to give millions to Kiva, but they have turned them down. Why? The heart of the mission is connecting people through lending.The humanity piece is very important to them and if you can't connect the dollars with humanity, then it doesn't fit with their organization. It's lovely to know that there are still people with that type of integrity out there.

Leadership Summit Reflections

2009-08-16T16:40:00.000-07:00

Leadership Summit was kind of like "Hole in the Gospel"-- you learn so much you are convicted to lead a more practical life for God.

Bill Hybels

Live out the first century dream (Acts 2) in the 21st century. Do we still believe the local church is the hope of the world?
The beauty, power and potential of the church lies in trust, love, the generosity of friends, church and colleagues.
We need to step up and be generous with God's blessings.
We need to walk by faith, not sight.
Remember, in a crisis, cash is not king, but Christ is King. The crisis isn't about money, it's about time. (Isn't this a good thing to remember at home as well, and in our lives. We need to be wise with our cash reserves so that when we do have a crisis, we can take the time to talk to God and figure out the next step. The wonderful thing about God is that He rescues us even when we don't take those precautions.)
In times of financial stress, people will give to a white hot kingdom vision.God wants people who are totally yielded to Him--whose hearts are fully His.
Live the Romans 8:6 life - living in sync with the Holy Spirit leads to life and peace (who doesn't want that!?)

Regarding management--three statements that stuck out to me: 1) the kindest form of management is the truth; 2) it demotivates top performers to let poor performers continue and 3) job descriptions should not just include skills, but competency. Some questions to ask yourself:

What do your colleagues and followers see when they look at you today?
What do other people thing of you?

Gary Hamel (The Future of Management)
Unprecedented changes = unprecedented opportunities requires unprecedented strategies.
Our problem is inertia (am I going forwards or backwards)
Are we crisis driven or opportunity driven?

Overcome the temptation to take refuge in denial: a) Face the facts, don't pretend there's an easy conversation; b) question your beliefs (humility); c) listen to renegades/dissidents. Question: Do we welcome dissent or stifle it?
Generate more strategic options (more new things): a) we clutch at the familiar--make change seem more exciting than standing pat; b) we must choose open, participatory conversations on change.
Deconstruct what you already believe. What hasn't changed for 3 to 4 years and why? Is it good, or just a habit? Learn to be contrarians (I have some friends that are very good at this). We must be visionary, yet practical, confident, but humble.

Look at our structure today, and consider the early church. The early church was spiritually powerful, but institutionally weak. Lives won't change till churches change. The new model = mobilize/connect/support.

Tim Kellar (The Prodigal God)
I'll write more when I finish the book. Suffice it to say that his writing reminds me of C.S. Lewis, in that I feel my brain being peeled back to absorb new understanding. Basically, whether we strive to be obedient, or we choose to live a pleasure seeking and disobedient life, either way, we miss the mark. Do you know that one of the meanings of prodigal is recklessly extravagant - rather than the connotation we give to the story of the prodigal son, it is the story of our recklessly extravagant God. I loved that this middle aged gentleman's church is filled with mostly 20 something people. Young people are hungry for Truth and he delivers it.

Dave Gibbons (The Monkey and the Fish)
I'm sure you'll hear more about this once I've read the book. Once again we hear about the need to be contrarian. Look at our churches today. Are the people in your church more like you than not? Churches need to be contrarian - it's easy to like people who are like you, the world doesn't see anything special there - "the world will stop and see something beautiful when we love what is different from us". The church must adapt and love, learn and serve in any culture (third culture).

The third culture leader is focused on the fringe: a) the misfit, not the masses; b) the margins lead the movements. He gave the example of a housewife with a website (I thought he said it was deuce.com but can't seem to find it on the web) who has thousands of followers - an example of someone on the fringe who is influencing the masses.
We have to have a different set of metrics: a) failure is success to God - it's your platform to humanity--He allows you to have these failures to touch the humanity in this world; b) look at human resources--gifts + tests + story (for an employer). For all of us - do you have time to listen to people's stories? Do you really see people?; c) weakness guides us more than our strength.
Vision. Pretty simple really - Love God. Love your neighbor. Relationships trump vision. Jesus did what He saw His Father do. We need relationaries, not visionaries (I loved this). Maybe what happens outside the building, is more important that what happens inside the building (speaking of church). The church's main task is to model equipping leaders, the best discipleship is life on life. Here he referenced the Medici Effect - another book that sounds interesting.
Obedience is more important than passion: a) deeper collaboration; b) communal living; c) prayer (here he said the church doesn't believe in the power of the Holy Spirit); d) radical sacrifice for the outsiders.

You can probably see why I wanted to read the book.

David Gergen (Eyewitness to Power)
This was an entertaining segment. One thing that all the pastors learned is that you lose people after 25 minutes - most usually to sexual fantasy. That brought a big laugh.

Don't confuse motion with progress
Go after big goals tenaciously
Look back at a 6 week period - what did you hope to accomplish, what did I do right and what did I do wrong--don't fool yourself.
Be willing to wrestle (with the questions)
Someone who can look farther back can look farther ahead
People may not be able to conquer flaws...how do you live with them
Good speeches contain 4 parts: Ethos (who you are); Emotion; Reason (include humor); and Emotion again (get up and get moving -- call to action).

Chip and Dan Heath (Made to Stick and Switch [not yet published])
This session was about why some ideas survive and others die.

Ideas can start out with hope (we can), and then most usually take a dive (which they called the valley of insight), and then end with confidence (we did it). Forewarn people on your team working towards the implementation of an idea, that this can happen.
Tolerance for failure is a necessary step for success, especially in a time of change.
Failure can possibly be an early warning sign of success.
There's always resistance to the journey for equality
Change your thinking - for example, instead of standing against poverty, take a stand for poverty (effecting change).

Wes Stafford
Mr. Stafford is the president and CEO of Compassion International. He shared the story of his youth, when as a child of missionary parents, he spent the school year in a boarding school. The boarding school was staffed by adults who didn't quite make the missionary cut, and so were put in charge of the school. He shared the story of himself and 50 of his classmates who were physically beaten, some sexually abused, not allowed to even have pictures of his parents anywhere in the room. It grieves me to hear of people who claim to follow God and follow Satan's teachings in the name of God. He finally told his mom, but just prior to boarding the plane, seconds before he said, and so he still went. His parents were going by boat and it took a month for them to get there. As a result, when he got to the boarding school he was forced to stand in a chair, holding a candle that was burning at each end. He was 10 years old. The man who forced him to do this told his classmates that because of him Africans would not get to know Jesus, because he TOLD, his parents would not save souls. Something came over this little boy, and he decided he was going to win this time, and held the candle in his fingers even though they began blistering. In fact, he was watching this in an "out of body" experience as often happens to abused children, until a classmate couldn't stand it any longer and knocked it out of his fingers. He spoke about this horrific experience, and the need to forgive. The forgiveness is most important for the victim, or else the bitterness and anger grows like a cancer inside of you. This was an emotionally draining session, it just hurts your heart so much.

Bono
This was different than I thought. We didn't get to see that much of Bono I didn't think, but it was still interesting.

When Bono was first invited to Summit, some 10 years or so ago, he blasted the church for standing on the sidelines when it came to justice, poverty and aids. I take it this caught the church by surprise, and they were offended, but also forced to look at themselves.
The church took action, and Bono said, that he knew the church was a sleeping giant, but he didn't know the church could move so fast. Now the church is in the forefront of this work.
Bono has a thing for the Man in the Moon story. He just loves the story of how man walked on the moon. I don't know all the details behind it. Hybels asked him if he ever felt like giving up, and Bono told this great story. He was walking in the park in Manhatten, he was feeling discouraged, and feeling like maybe he would just give up the group, retire, etc. A man was sitting on a bench - he looked like he was homeless, and he was talking crazy. But, he said hey to Bono, and asked if he would like to buy a newspaper (he had a bagful of newspapers at his feet). Bono said, what do you have--he pulled out a newspaper with the headline "Man Walks on the Moon". Every newspaper in the bag was "Man Walks on the Moon". He bought them all.

This is the longest post I've ever done! Whew. . . please excuse any typos/grammar . . .

2009-08-05T17:28:00.000-07:00

A Mighty Long Way: My Journey to Justice at Little Rock Central High School by Carlotta Walls Lanier

My rating: 4 of 5 stars
This book was about the Little Rock 9, and the racial upheaval that took place during the desegregation of Central High. I am sad to confess my ignorance of history. I was not aware that the school was closed for a whole school year to both black and white students. This first person account was factual and interesting. The hurt to the heart is expressed in this sentiment: "Some days I was so mentally exhausted that I didn't have the energy to guard my heart. In those low moments, when the troublemakers hurled their insults, they smashed my spirit like bricks."

This would be a great book for teens I think. It made me want to learn more and I wanted to see pictures. The story of how one of the teens, Elizabeth Eckford ended up going alone on the first day they were allowed in (isn't that crazy, to have to be allowed in to a school), and how the mob treated her blows my mind. I think the part that gets to you is, how do I know I wouldn't act like that? When you see the pictures (look online), and the absolute hatred in people's faces it seems unbelievable - and it really is, isn't it? Who can believe human beings would treat others that same way. Carlotta says: "when I was suffering in those hallowed halls, they (white students and teachers) turned away. They did nothing. They said nothing. They chose not to see". It makes you stand up and take notice of what you are doing or not doing for people that are different than you today. . .

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Waiting for Columbus

2009-07-17T06:21:00.000-07:00

Waiting for Columbus by Thomas Trofimuk is a kind of sensuous novel I think. I certainly would like to meet the Columbus from this book who loved wine, women and adventure. I'm pretty sure he didn't look like the real Columbus in the picture to the left. The great things about books is you can kindof make them look like they want. I'm pretty sure my Columbus would be handsome!

A man is brought to an institution, he truly believes he is Christopher Columbus. He tells wonderful stories with a charisma that draws people to him. He tells stories of his desire to find the new world, stories of women he has made love to and how that loving feels, stories of his doubts. Are the stories real and true, or are they false? To tell more would ruin your own chance to be drawn into the world of Waiting for Columbus!

Saints in Limbo

2009-07-17T06:09:00.000-07:00

It was the kind of day when even the lost believed. When possibilities were larger than reason, when potential was grander than circumstance, when the long dark days of doubt were suddenly cast off and laid to rest. Brushed away with a smile and a certainty. And in this moment, from this place, you knew the real magic could happen.

Okay, I started this at around 11:30 last night (my husband was snoring), and ended up staying up till 2 am to finish it. If you were as attracted to this very first paragraph in the book as I was, you will want to run to the library and get Saints in Limbo by River Jordan. This is the first book I've read by her, but am eager to read more from this wonderful storyteller. I did not know this book was christian fiction--it is definitely the good variety of christian fiction. I didn't think it was smarmy at all. I truly dislike smarmy christian ficiton! She uses wonderful language as well, something that is often missing from many genres of books. For example:

The firstborn leaves of March had sprouted into the tiniest sea of baby green. The world was breathing in and out, moving everything in its path slightly, and on due course, with a gentle, four-edges-of-the-earth kiss.

Isnt' that great? I'm not going to return this book to the library for a while, it's worth a re-read.

A Quote to Ponder

2009-07-06T16:49:00.000-07:00

A quote from Dallas Willard (The Spirit of the Disciplines) to ponder:

The world can no longer be left to mere diplomats, politicians and business leaders. They have done the best they could, no doubt. But this is an age for spiritual heroes--a time for men and women to be heroic in their faith and in spiritual character and power. The greatest danger to the Christian church today is that of pitching it's message too low.

Quotes like this really tempt me to buy books (who can read this and not want to read the book!). I'm guessing it's sinful to keep satisfying that lust!

Somehow this makes me think of the battle scene in Lord of the Rings, the one where they really don't think there is any remote chance that they will win or survive, then "light" (Gandolf) parts the way and brings hope. This may seem a little weird to some of you . . .

Wierd Dreams

2009-07-02T04:07:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of things I won't miss about my cycle when (and if) I ever do get finished with the darn thing, but one thing I will miss is weird dreams. I don't always have this happen, but this time I did. So okay, I'm driving a semi truck, and I don't even know how to drive a semi truck. I'm coming up to some hills covered with water, and I don't know how to stop or slow down. To make matters worse, there's a cow walking really slowly in the water on the road in front of me. I don't know how I manage it, but I do slow down, and manage to avoid the cow and an accident. Then, somehow, I'm at a house, and there's a woman there in a wedding dress. But where did the wedding dress come from - all I really know about this is I know it's not hers because her's has gold thread through the ruffles at the top. So this is all really strange, but even stranger is, running through the dream there is a song kind of humming through me, I know the tune, but the only words that I know are Jesus, He's all you need. This is an actual song, but I just can't bring it to mind right now. The cool thing about this is, as it's humming through me, and I'm thinking about the Bible verse about how you will always have trials, and that you should meet these trials with joy, I'm realizing, it's not joy, laugh laugh joy, but joy, deep contentment humming through you, because, after all, Jesus, He's all you need. Very strange, but good in that strange weird dream sort of way!

Sister Support Needed!

2009-06-22T17:30:00.000-07:00

I've recently learned of two non-profits that could benefit from our support. The first, The Colour Sisterhood: The sisterhood seeks to champion the cause of the orphan child and widow, to come alongside women (near and far) who are facing challenge, and it ultimately seeks to influence nations with goodness and answers that are to be found in God (from their website)

The second, Kiva, allows you to loan money to an entrepreneur, many of whom are from third world countires. You choose the person/enterprise you want to support and loan them the money through an online service. They have 9 months to pay you back. You can do this for as little as $25. You can help men and women begin their own business and become self-supporting. How cool is that!

Heaven on Earth

2009-06-19T18:40:00.000-07:00

I'm reading an absolutely wonderful book called The Hole in the Gospel by Richard Stearns, the CEO of World Vision. I am on fire to read more, and I implore all my friends to read this book so that we can talk about it together, and better yet, be the people God created us to be. Richard Stearns lived in a 10 bedroom fieldstone farmhouse on 5 acres of land, he drove a company provided Jaguar to work, he was the CEO of Lenox China making boocoo bucks. He left it all to serve God as the CEO of World Vision. Part of the reason I like it so much is that he really didn't want to, but, although extremely reluctant, and although he ignored the really strong hints God put in his way, he still answered God's call. I think I can be a lot like that! I don't even know where to start with everything that is speaking to me . . . consider the following quotes:

... as Christians, are we really given the options of turning away from the world's problems? Does God permit that?
. . . Jesus asked a great deal of those who followeed Hiim. He expected much more from them than just believing He was God's Son. He challenged them to embrace radically different standards, to love their neighbors and their enemies, to forgive thos who wronged them, to lift up the poor and downtrodden, to share what they had with those who had little, and to live lives of sacrifice. Then he likened their effect on the world around them to that which light has on darkness.
. . .the good news was meant to change the world. Belief is not enough. Worship is not enough. Personal morality is not enough. And Christian community is not enough. God has always demanded more. When we committed ourselves to following Christ, we also committed to living our lives in such a way that a watchingworld would catch a glimpse of God's charager--His love, justice, and mercy--through our words, actions, and behavior. . . Living out our faith privately was never meant to be an option.
What if two billion people embraced this vision of God transforming ou world--through them. Imagine it. Indeed, what if even two thousand people took their faith to the next level--what might God do? Two thousand years ago the world was changed forever by just twelve. It can happen again.

And this is just the introduction to the book! Here is the last paragraph of the forward:

The word gospel literally means "good news." Jesus declared that He had come to "preach good news to the poor". (Luke 4:18) . . . What "good news" have God's people brought to the world's three billion poor? What "gospel" have millions of Africa's AIDS orphans seen? What gospel have most of us embraced in the twenty-first centruy? The answer is found in the title of this book: a gospel with a hole in it.

A Great Summer Read!

2009-06-19T18:19:00.000-07:00

The Forgotten Garden by Kate Morton is a must read book. It didn't keep me quite as spell bound as The Thirteenth Tale, but all during the day I would be wondering what would come next, and look forward to coming home and beginning to read again.

It's a little bit The Secret Garden, a little bit The Thirteenth Tale, a little bit Charles Dickens and a little bit The Fairy Tales Grimm! I had some trouble in the beginning as the skips between eras didn't seem smooth to me, but it wasn't long before I was drawn into the story (I even resisted mightily the impulse to skip to the end and find out what was going on). I wanted to savor the wondering I had as I read and tried to figure out what would happen next.

A little girl on a ship is abandoned and adopted by a sailor and his wife. A family living in poverty is being followed by a sinister man. A young girl finds out she's adopted on her coming of age birthday. A granddaughter discovers she has inherited a cottage in England. An impish girl makes up stories to entice the neighborhood children. What weaves these circumstances together? You'll have to read it to find out!

Gossip and Dictionaries

2009-05-26T16:43:00.001-07:00

I'm reading a book my mom gave me: Open Secrets: A Spiritual Journey Through A Country Church. I get a kick out of how the author pokes a little fun at himself--he has a PhD in Theology and comes to a little country church for his first call. He thinks rather highly of himself. His father points out that a 28 all he's done is go to school, he's never worked, he's married and has a child coming--yet, he's not accepting the call from this little church in New Cana, IL- it's time to get to it! Richard (the 28 year old in question) doesn't want to come right out and say that he's waiting for something better, yet that's what it is. Anyway, he does end up in New Cana, and for all his book learning, he learns much more about his own inadequacies, and about you know, real people, than you can learn from reading a book and being in class. What does this have to do with gossip? Well, he has a chapter called "Gossiping the Gospel":

"The word gossip originally implied a spiritual relationship. A gossip was a sponsor at a baptism, one who spoke on behalf of the child and who would provide spiritual guidance to the child as it grew in years. A gossip was your godmother or godfather. Gossiping was speech within the community of the baptized. . .Gossip is the community's way of conducting moral discourse and, in an oddly indirect way, of forgiving old offenses. In our town all desires were known, no secrets were hid, and every heart was an open book. Every life was gossiped by all, and all were gossips."

Isn't that just fascinating? I had to look it up in the dictionary to make sure he was really telling the truth! It's almost as this definition has disappeared from our culture.

I recently had a conversation with a friend who was excited about how her students were using their dictionaries, and how excited they were to consider words and their meanings. Wouldn't it be great if we got back to that sort of rich language, in our writing and in our vocabulary. The only time I really use a dictionary is during Bible study. Almost every time the definition takes me deeper into the passage I'm studying. I need to do more of this in my recreational reading. Usually, I'm in a hurry to absorb the story, and don't want to take the time. I need to learn to slow down--perhaps I'll find the story will have more depth and meaning for me if I do.

The Middle Place by Kelly Corrigan

2009-05-25T06:06:00.000-07:00

This is our Book Club book for June. It is a great story about life, finding yourself, falling in love, dealing with cancer, and family--not necessarily in that order. If you go to her website, , and listen to the trailer, you will get a real sense of her voice. What is "The Middle Place"? It's about being a parent and a child at the same time. It's a place we will (God willing) be for an extended time in our lives. I can't imagine anyone not liking this book. Also watch her video "Transcending", it may bring tears to your eyes!

I have been so lucky in the books I'm reading lately--hopefully this will continue!

The Writing On My Forehead

2009-05-23T11:51:00.000-07:00

What a good book. The Writing On My Forehead by Nafisa Haji is the story of an Indo-Pakistani girl living in the United States. The main character, Saira is an inquisitive child, the kind who gets into trouble because of her curiosity. The story is about being that kind of person, in a world that is structured by cultural expectations, including arranged marriages. It involves her growing into herself as an independent American and a daughter of an Indo-Pakistani family. She is the kind of woman you root for, and the ending of the story was a surprise to me, I didn't get that "aha" moment till the very last pages. I highly recommend it and give it a 5!

Child Witch Hunts in Africa

2009-05-23T06:03:00.001-07:00

Have you seen this story (http://abcnews.go.com/video/playerIndex?id=7658899)?
Be warned, it is sad and horrible. It distresses me that this is going on in the name of Jesus. It amazes me that a country has laws about witchcraft. It hurts me what they are doing to children.

The Earth Hums in B Flat

2009-05-22T18:16:00.000-07:00

The author of The Earth Hums in B Flat is 62 years old, this is her first novel. I love that! Gwenni can fly -- she flies over her village, and hears the Earth's music,but also discovers secrets. Will the secrets hurt or help her and her family. I love Gwenni's voice, and how her "oddness" that her mom finds so disturbing is considered quaint by her neighbors. Gwenni wants to be a detective, but the police officer tells her:

"Detecting isn't a suitable job for a woman, Gwenni" he says. But he won't' tell me why it isn't. Maybe he doesn't know.

That made me laugh. So many things aren't suitable in life, but who's to say why they're not. We always act as though suitable is so desirable, don't we!?

Gwenni flies at night, but is always striving to fly while she's wide awake. I had a dream once that I was flying. It was so real that I'm not convinced that it wasn't real! It was though I had no burdens, nothing to weigh me down--such a sense of contentment and well being. I am always wishing I can repeat that dream.

Gwenni's flying doesn't always bring her a sense of well being, sometimes it scares her, but still, she doesn't want to lose it. She says:

"Up here, far away from everybody, the night is peaceful; there's no sound except the hum of the Earth. . . Mr. Hughes Music said it was B flat . . . But he doesn't know how the Earth's deep, never-ending note clothes me in rainbow colours, fills my head with all the books ever written, and feeds me with the smell of Mrs. Sargent's famous vanilla biscuits . . ."

A Book to Make Friends With

2009-05-19T16:22:00.000-07:00

The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society is a 5 in my view. What a great book. I would take just about every character in this book as a friend in my real world. The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society is the name of a book club that was created to protect its members from arrest by the Germans. As a result, people who were not readers were "forced" to begin to read books and talk about them with their neighbors. The main character, Juliet, finds out about this club through a correspondence she begins with one of it's members. It is an engaging and charming book, the kind that you savor as you read it, and, for me anyway, one that is worth re-reading. These non-readers meet authors that they learn from, and some begin on a journey of reading that was never part of their life before. In her correspondance Juliet says "That's what I love about reading: one tiny thing will interest you in a book, and that tiny thing will lead you onto another book, and another bit there will lead you onto a third book. It's all geometrically progressive--all with no end in sight, and for no other reason than enjoyment." I couldn't have said it better myself. Isola, a member of the society says: "I didn't like Wuthering Heights at first, but the minute that specter, Cathy, scrabbled her bony fingers on the window glass--I was grasped by the throat and could not let go." I'm so glad that I wasn't an adult when I first was "grabbed by the throat" by a book. As Juliet carries on her correspondence with the society, each one shares with her the book they read, and their thoughts on it. In this way you feel you get to know them intimately, and long to know more about them. Their thoughts about their island home being occupied by Germans provoke you to consider how you treat all people, not just the ones you like. Even in hard situations, even when a whole people seems evil, there are some that stand out as decent human beings. In short, I find nothing not to like in this book. It would be a great present for a friend, or an addition to a library.

Do You Think Elizabeth Bennet Didn't Like Making Love to Darcy?

2009-05-19T16:08:00.001-07:00

I mean who can really believe that! Yet, in Colleen McCullough's new book "The Independence of Miss Mary Bennet", that is what she leads us to believe. Although this book is about the youngest sister, Mary, I picked it up to see what the author did with Elizabeth and Darcy. This is really a silly romance novel disguised to entice us by the title and our curiosity about Darcy and Elizabeth. I can't really say that I read this book, but I did skim it really fast so I could see what she did with the characters. It was disappointing. I mean, who can believe that Elizabeth would be disappointed in her marriage, and that the servants all don't like Darcy because he's cold and stern. I mean, come on, in Pride and Prejudice we learned the servants said he was one of the kindest, most generous people they knew. (On a side note here, how disappointing that when I went to pick up the link at BN the first page and a half was all movies, not even the actual book!) The story itself is a little fantastic, Mary was plain, now she's beautiful. Although beautiful, and more intelligent than in Pride and Prejudice, she isn't very smart in a practical sense. Then of course she does fall in love and into bed with her future husband before they get married, just like in any sordid romance novel. Fortunately, things do work out better for Elizabeth and Darcy, now he understands that he just needed to take his time and coax her into enjoying the intimacy of marriage. Ugh. I just really don't recommend this book. On another side note, Lara - I just can't believe you've never read Pride and Prejudice, THAT book, I highly recommend. This book, I can only rate as a 1.

Advance Review Library Book Results

2009-05-05T14:31:00.000-07:00

I did pretty good! Not one book was smarmy, my word for predictable romantic fiction, avoidable at all costs. Here are my ratings, one being bad and 5 being excellent.

A Flickering Light by Jane Kirkpatrick: 3
I really like Jane Kirkpatrick, so this book was a little disappointing to me. I really liked her Love to Water my Soul, A Gathering of Finches and Mystic Sweet Communion. This story, about a girl from the 1900's with a love of photography and an attraction to her married male employer just didn't quite do it for me. Her A Simple Gift of Comfort: Healing Words for Difficult Times is a lovely gift for someone who is struggling in life.

Drawing in the Dust by Zoe Klein: 5
This books was so good. I loved that the author is a woman rabbi and knows her Bible so well. She took her Bible knowledge, used her imagination and created an intriguing story. Page, an american archeologist uncovers the bones of the prophet Jeremiah under the haunted home of an Arab couple. Jeremiah's bones are not alone however, they are wrapped around the bones of the mysterious Anatiya who has written a scroll about her parallel journey with Jeremiah. Naturally Page is on a journey of her own. She is always looking for Elijah in the bones that she uncovers as an archeologist, so she misses the story of the bones. Her colleague, Mortechai, says "it is sad for the bones you find. That they are trying to tell you their story, and you are mad at them for obeying God's order. They still have magic Page. You only have to be open to meeting them on their terms. . . Bones are intimate. Even your lover never touches them. They are an ivory relief of an actual life, a physical record of journeys braved, wars fought, loves entangled."

Healing Waters by Nancy Rue and Stephen Arterburn: 3
This is a christian fiction book, which is better than average. It's the story of a beautiful woman in charge of a Christian ministry where they trust God to heal everything. She becomes tragically burned and at first believes God will heal her, and expects those around her to believe that as well. Her sister, who has struggles of her own, comes to care for her in the process learns to take care of herself. Her faith increases, while her burned and scarred sister's decreases.

The Horse Boy: A Father's Quest to Heal His Son by Rupert Isaacson: 5
This book was so interesting. Can an autistic boy be healed by Shamans and horses? This family's journey into Mongolia to visit the healing shamans results in some big changes in their young son's behaviours. It's a fantastic journey - fantastic in the travels they made, and fantastic in the choices they made. Their young son has an affinity for horses, or at least, horses have an affinity for them, and this is how the journey begins. This is true, which makes it all the more fascinating.

Lace Makers of Glenmara by Heather Barbieri: 2
Did not like this story. I never really like stories where women sleep with men on their first meeting, and then wonder if it's love. . .

Bride of Frankenstein

2009-05-05T14:18:00.000-07:00

No, this is not a book I've just read, rather, it's what I think I looked like prior to going to bed Friday night. After starting the week with a kidney stone and an emergency visit to the hospital on Tuesday morning, I ended the week at a sleep clinic. It was so strange sleeping in a "hotel room" without any other family members. I am so sad that I didn't bring my camera so you could have all had a view of what I looked like! About 15 wires attached to my scalp, more on my neck and chest, 2 on each of my legs, and monitors wrapped around my chest and abdomen, and some sort of tube thing similar to the oxygen tubes people wear in the hospital around my face and nostrils. I was a vision in loveliness! Then you lay down and lights out. Your technician's voice comes floating into the air--move your eyes to the right, to the left, up and down. Open your eyes, close your eyes, wiggle your toes, etc. Then you go to sleep, while they video and monitor you for the night. This freaked some of my friends out, but it didn't really bother me. Then at 6 "the voice" wakes you, it's time to get unhooked, shower and go home. It will be interesting to hear the results (2 weeks from now).

I'm Back

2009-04-18T14:23:00.000-07:00

For at least a day. Blogs and facebook take a lot of time, and that has not been at a premium lately. What a beautiful day today, but I was restless and crabby so I decided I needed a book. Do you ever feel that way, that you just need a book to take yourself out of this world and into another? Well I knew that was just what I needed to get both my brain and body to relax, so I went to the library and returned my overdue books, and went to my favorite place to look for books in the library - the advance reader area, and boy, did I hit the jackpot. Some are so new they don't even have info on the B/N website yet.

I didn't find just one book, but FIVE! Drawing in the Dust, The Horse Boy, the Lace Makers of Glenmara, Healing Waters, and a new one by Jane Kirkpatrick, A Flickering Light (yeah)! I was hard pressed to know which one to start with, but choose Drawing in the Dust - a novel by a woman rabbi about an archeologist who finds the bones of the prophet Jeremiah locked in an embrace with a woman named Anatiya. It is so good so far - kind of like People of the Book in that it has a lot of Jewish history along with it. I love being taken out of myself into another life (which probably means I should make mine more interesting)!

I recently finished The Heminges of Monticello which was good but disturbing. How can a man live and have children with a woman for 30 some years and not free her. I wish there were actual words she (or he) had written so we could get a glimpse into their feelings for each other. They began their relationship in Paris when she was only 17. It blows my mind that she could have gone to a court in Paris and have been made free, yet she choose to return with Jefferson. Granted, she bargained with him for the freedom of her children, but still, she could have been free. Instead she remained a slave mistress for all those years. She sure put a lot of trust in him. Is it love that is foolish, or did she feel that the known was better than the unknown? And then, having children, and knowing how my husband loves our children, to relegate them to living as slaves and not (to our knowledge) interact with them as he would with his white children. It boggles the mind.

Well, enough writing, time to get back to reading :-)

The Lost Memoirs of Jane Austen

2009-03-09T08:46:00.000-07:00

I picked this book up on a whim. I wanted something that would engage me, and I must say, I enjoyed this book very much. It was written much in Jane Austen's own style, and the many references to her books throughout was fun. I was a little confused at first because the book is written as though it were truth--I was glad to read the Author's note at the end so it could set my brain straight on what was truth and what was fiction.

It was fun to read of Jane's "life" experiences and see how they became the stories she wrote. Could it be that Jane did have her own Mr. Darcy? Are her books based on real life experiences? As always I love a strong heroine who won't give in to society's plan to "buttonhole" her into their idea of what a woman should be, but instead holds out for what is real and true for her. I wonder how many women in that era were women like us, but trapped in the times in which they lived. Aren't we lucky to be able to move around in our lives with out really any limitations except those which we(or our God) place on ourselves?

The world has changed so much - I wonder if future readers will even have an understanding of Jane Austen's world? I read a "George and Martha" book to a class of pre-schoolers this morning, and I had to stop and explain what a phone booth was - in today's world, George would have called from a cell phone. Then stop and consider manners - how can you even describe the large changes in that area? I was reading blogs about "Going Galt" this weekend (for you fans of Atlas Shrugged it references John Galt). I really am kind of surprised by how rude some of the blogger comments are. I think that yes, in polite society we are not always honest, and I'm a big fan of honesty, but in a respectful way. Not quite sure how I got from Jane Austen to Going Galt, but there it is! Going Galt intrigues me . . . you may be hearing more about this!

A Ramble

2009-03-05T14:47:00.000-08:00

A ramble through my brain - that's sort of what this blog will be like. I am hyper because it is actually warm out - I had my office window open all afternoon. I cannot believe how the warmth and smell of warm air can so lift my spirits. My office partner Phil, was like a 2 year old this afternoon - he is excited to go out and golf with a friend tomorrow. My brother tried to bring me down (thanks Jim!) by telling me a big snow storm is coming next week. But I'm just going to pretend he didn't say that. Tonight I'm going to paint my toe nails RED, and if it's above 50 tomorrow I'm wearing sandals to show them off.

My niece mentioned that I wasn't on here much lately, which is true. We were in Schaumberg this weekend visiting Josh and Megan, and I had a very busy week prior to leaving. I need my alone woman time and there is no alone time when you go visiting. Sunday night when we got home I was crabby so I sent myself to bed early. Did the same on Monday when I should have been getting groceries. Tuesday night I went for a mammogram - I thought it had only been 2 years but it was 3! Who wants to write on a blog when you come home after having your breast slapped on a plate like it was a piece of meat and then squeezed tight till you can hardly stand it! Last night was Bible Study and then LOST, so it feels really good to just have some free time right now. Well, it's not really free time, I need to do wash, but I plan to luxuriate in the hot tub while waiting for that first load and then hey, I can do anything I want, which is just the way I like it! :-)

No Time

2009-03-03T18:10:00.000-08:00

It feels as though I am so busy there is no time for anything. I even forgot to begin my Calvin Miller The Christ of Easter Devotion. Sometimes it feels like this world is just sucking me in. However, loved this bit from the prayer from Monday's reading--shared with a couple people today and was encouraged and felt loved by those conversations:

It is difficult not to crave power in this competitive world; but please, Lord, help me crave the pleasure of your company instead.

This gets me through every day, the pleasure of sharing company with the I AM of the universe . . .

Ash Wednesday

2009-02-25T04:44:00.008-08:00

This morning I met my niece and Beth at St. Francis for the 7 a.m. Ash Wednesday service. I had been looking forward to this since last night - it felt like it was going to be a special time with God, and it truly was that way. For me, this was the perfect way to start the Lenton season. The opening verse was from Joel 2: 12-18--rend your hearts, not your garments. We had studied this verse in the Queen Esther Beth Moore bible study as well, and it captured my attention. Rend your hearts . . . we can rend our hearts before God, and His grace covers all that implies. The 2nd reading was from 2 Corinthians 5:20 - 6:2--"for our sake He made Him to be sin who did not know sin, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him". That really brings it home, doesn't it! The message was on how Jesus thirsts for each one of us. He thirsts for each one of us . . . and we in turn thirst for Him. He talked about how what we choose to give up for Lent points us to that thirst, and Jesus is always ready and willing to fulfill that longing. This is only my 2nd Ash Wed. service - I went to one at the Episcopalian church several years ago which was in the evening. This is the first time I'm wearing my ashes all day. I have to say, it feels like there is a HUGE black spot on my forehead, but, I guess that's partly the point isn't it? I am a huge black spot, excepting for God's saving grace. Blessings on your day today, and all the days between now and Easter. In the Amplified version of the Bible, after "Selah", it always says [pause and think calmly of that]. Hope you can find time in your day to pause and think calmly of what this season will mean to you.

Language of God Part 2

2009-02-19T17:02:00.001-08:00

Thoughts have been flying around in my head for about a week now, so I'll see if I can make some sense of them on "paper". First, the BIG BANG! Science is in support of the Big Bang theory - go figure! It's intriguing to me how often science and archeology are proving Bible stories to be historically accurate, pointing to a real God who is involved in the world. It also intrigues me that even agnostic scientists seem to reluctantly come to this conclusion. Astrophysicist Robert Jastrow is quoted as saying: "At this moment it seems as though science will never be able to raise the curtain on the mystery of creation. For the scientist who has lived by his faith in the power of reason, the story ends like a bad dream. He has scaled the mountains of ignorance; he is about to conquer the highest peak; as he pulls himself over the final rock, he is greeted by a band of theologians who have been sitting there for centuries." (from God and the Astronomers) Isn't that great!

There are bits in this book that remind me of Narnia. It made me wonder, was C. S. Lewis so incredibly smart that he knew and understood some of the things science has discovered? For example, scientists believe that our sun is not the first sun, but maybe the 2nd or 3rd sun. In one of the Narnia stories, the children are in a world with the witch, and she says that the sun is a dying sun, and that world is ending. The other part that reminded me of Narnia was when Collins says "Nearly all of the atoms in your body were once cooked in the nuclear furnace of an ancient supernova--you are truly made of stardust". That reminded me of how in Narnia the stars were people. I always loved the idea of the stars being persons, so it's nice to know I have a little of that in me. Also, the Bible says that God knows all the stars by name so I like to think of them as living persons (kind of silly, I know).

As you read Language of God, you learn how everything had to be in certain measurements--there had to be just the right amount of quarks and antiquarks , mass and energy, gravity - everything had to be precisely right in order to have this universe that we live on be habitable for human beings. If anything was just a fraction off, earth would not have been. It rather boggles the mind, especially when you're not totally understanding everything you're reading. An example would be quarks - neutrons and protons are made of 6 quarks, and although I don't think I fully grasp what they are, I find it very whimsical that scientists named the quarks "up", "down", "strange" "charmed" and "bottom"!

I have to re-read so much because I think I grasp it when I read it, but then I don't fully remember it. I do find so much of it to be very interesting, and I like how Collins continually comes back to how Science and God don't have to be against each other, but in fact can support each other.