What Makes the Difference for a Kid?

Breaking Night: A Memoir of Forgiveness, Survival, and My Journey from Homeless to Harvard by Liz Murray

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Thank you Goodreads for this complimentary copy of "Breaking Night".

This was one of those books that I didn't think I liked that much, but then found myself telling other people about it. It's always interesting when that happens, and I realize I liked it better than I thought.

I am amazed at the author's memory, and also stunned that children grow up in homes like hers. I can't imagine growing up in a home where "normal" is your parents lining up their drug paraphernalia on the kitchen table and shooting up. A home where you wait eagerly for that disability check, buy a few groceries, and then spend the rest on drugs. Waiting for the mailman by the window, while you eat, perhaps, bread with mayonnaise for supper. Yet this little girl loved her parents. She wanted to be with them and feel loved by them. It's an experience that I really can't comprehend.

Liz was observant and resourceful. She didn't go to school, but she survived. She watched and learned how to steal, how to make money pumping gas, and how to evade those pesky phone calls from school, threatening to remove her from home and put her in a group home.

By the time Liz was in her early teens, her mom had contracted aids. She left Liz's dad and moved in with another man. Through a variety of circumstances Liz decides to leave the protection, and the care, of her mom and begins to live on the streets. She followed this "carefree" life until she realized she couldn't count on other people to take care of her the rest of her life. She realized as well, that she was the only person she could count on to make that change.

My favorite parts of the book were towards the end, where Liz made a conscious choice to go back to school. She was still homeless, but she realized she needed to get an education to move forward. She shares how discouraging it was to visit alternative schools and be judged by how she looked, and dismissed without being acknowledged as someone who could achieve. She almost gave up - but somehow, for reasons she doesn't know, a feeling of hope brings her to the next alternative school interview. She arrives late, but ends up being accepted. Enrolling requires her to get her old transcripts, and she shares how she felt like such a failure when she saw all those failing grades - she only passed one class. But she hit on the idea of asking for a transcript from her new school, Humanities Preparatory School. She looks at that fresh page, and all those blanks just waiting for an "A". That's we she decides for herself. She wants all A's and she wants to complete four years of high school in two years. She also shares how hard it was--hiding her homelessness, finding places to sleep and shower, finding food, and making that decision, every day, that she is going to get up and go to school--not just stay in bed and hang out with her friends. She tells how her teachers really look at her, and really want to know her. She begins to love them, and to love school, and she wants to go to school not only to learn, but because she doesn't want to disappoint them.

This, the love between a teacher and student, seems to me to be the only way to hook kids into achievement. Respect for the student, and a student's respect for the teacher, is the winning combination. I love that Liz has taken her education and is using it to help ther students. In fact, they have opened one of the first schools for homeless students in New York City (www.manifestliving.com).

I highly recommend this read!

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